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Saturday, September 23, 2017

When You Feel Broken Inside

without the dark
 
This life certainly likes to push us to our limits, but sometimes, it all seems like too much and we fall into a black abyss of despair and hopelessness.
 
Feeling broken doesn’t mean that you should just give up entirely, however; it just means you need to take a step back and let those feelings come to the surface.
 
We all feel broken from time to time, because life can seem heartbreaking and terrifying when we go through certain experiences. These life lessons only make us stronger and more capable of dealing with life, though, so use your brokenness as a gift that will help you grow as a person.
 
HERE ARE 8 THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN YOU FEEL BROKEN:
 
1. REMEMBER THAT CRACKS ALLOW LIGHT TO COME IN.
If you didn’t become broken from time to time, there would be no place for the light to enter your soul. Basically, it takes awful, heart-wrenching experiences for us to see all the good in the world sometimes, and for us to go through a transformation of the soul. If we just had positive, uplifting experiences all the time, we would have no room to grow and no life experiences that would challenge us to become more resilient, powerful people.

You can’t expect life to grant you an easy ride; if it did, you would miss out on life-changing experiences that would break you open, tear you apart, and rebuild you into a better version of yourself. Many parts of ourselves open up when we feel broken, so remember this any time you feel exhausted and utterly shattered by life.

 
2. REMEMBER TO ACCEPT AND HONOR YOUR FEELINGS; DON’T FIGHT THEM.
Don’t feel bad for having negative or heavy emotions; if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be human. Certain experiences warrant a strong reaction from us, and sometimes that means crying, screaming, falling to our knees, and just accepting the waves of emotion that come over us. Keeping all of this balled up inside will only backfire in the end, so don’t ever keep your feelings hidden for fear of other people’s reactions. Fighting off your feelings will only delay the breakdown, and you’ll walk around feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders. You must walk bravely into the place within you that harbors these deep emotions, so you can begin to work through them and figure out what they want you to take from all you’ve been through.

 
3. KEEP REMEMBERING YOUR “WHY.”
During hardships, we often forget what we even want from life in the first place. We all came here to love with all of our hearts, and increase the vibration of this planet in unison. When you feel broken, you can easily overlook or forget your mission here on Earth, but going through hard times actually gives your purpose more depth. If you didn’t go through unpleasant experiences, you wouldn’t be able to relate to so many other people on this planet who go through hard times almost every day. Keep your “why” in mind, and reflect on how the negative situations you’ve encountered allow you to have a more well-rounded perspective and better serve your purpose on Earth.

 
4. REMEMBER EVERYTHING THAT EXISTS BEYOND YOUR BROKENNESS.
Just because you feel broken, does not mean the whole world shares your perspective. It does not mean the entire planet must go down in flames because of one bad day or experience you had, so remember to broaden your perspective next time you go through bad times. Think of the fact that you still get to breathe fresh air, see the clouds float by on a sunny day, feel the wind on your skin, smile at a stranger..think of all these beautiful little things you can still do even though you feel broken. Remember all of the good things happening on the planet despite your temporary slump, and the whole world won’t look like such a dark place anymore.

 
5. REMEMBER THE FRIENDS AND FAMILY THAT ARE THERE FOR SUPPORT.
When you feel down and out about life, your friends and family will comfort you and be your rock when you need them. Don’t hesitate to ask them for help, because we all need some assistance when we go through a rough patch in life. If you feel like a burden on them, just remember all the times you were there for them; the people who care about you would gladly do the same for you.

 
6. REMEMBER TO FOCUS ON THE THINGS THAT BRING YOU JOY.
So often when we feel broken, we focus our attention entirely on our despair and forget about the things that bring us happiness. Go out and get some sunshine, plant some flowers, ride your bike, catch up with friends over coffee, or simply anything on this Earth that makes your heart light up with joy. Just because you feel broken, doesn’t mean you have to spend every waking minute of your life mulling over your feelings and wallowing in a sea of turmoil.

 
7. DON’T IDENTIFY SO MUCH WITH YOUR FEELINGS.
Remember that you don’t really own your feelings or thoughts; they just come and go as they please, and you just get to watch them make an appearance, even if you didn’t invite them in. Think about this: you consciously invite friends and family over to your house, but you don’t knock on the doors of your emotions and give them an invitation to your brain. It just doesn’t work that way, so remember that you don’t have to identify with your feelings. You are SO much more than your temporary emotions, so don’t let them control you.


8. REMEMBER THAT LIFE IS A SERIES OF UPS AND DOWNS, AND THIS IS ONLY TEMPORARY.
Just like your emotions, this whole ride we have been thrown onto since birth only exists for a short while. We take it so seriously, yet overlook the fact that we don’t get to spend forever in this existence. Enjoy it while it lasts; yes, even the hardships and despair, because when you look back on your life, you will thank your brokenness just as much as your happiness for all it taught you on your own personal journey.

Courtesy of Power of Positivity

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Loopholes...

Here’s a short but very good giggle from our Meredith's Jack…

Two well-dressed lawyers went to an expensive restaurant…ordered 2 coffees and then took out sandwiches from their briefcases to eat.
 

Waitress: Sorry Sir!! But you can't eat your OWN food here...it’s against the rules.
 

The lawyers quietly looked at each other and EXCHANGED their sandwiches and continued their meals!!!
 

You can trust lawyers to find loopholes in any rules…

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Garden snakes can be dangerous

Here’s an oldie but very good one from our Meredith's Jack…. Open-mouthed smile

I didn't think twice about this tiny fellow on my baby boxwood until I got this letter:

GARDEN SNAKES CAN BE DANGEROUS . . .


Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes.

garden snake



Here's why.


A couple in Sweetwater, Texas , had a lot of potted plants .  During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.



It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants . When it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.




She let out a very loud scream.


 The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was.  She told him there was a snake under the sofa.


He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.  About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind . He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.


His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still, and called an ambulance.


The attendants, who rushed in, would not listen to his protests, loaded him on the stretcher, and started carrying him out.



About that time, the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher . That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.



The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake . He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch.  Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief .


But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around .  She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.


The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.


The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.


The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that the snake had bitten him .  She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

 

By now, the police had arrived.

Breathe here . . .

 
They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred .
They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little garden snake!


The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife .


Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it . He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table . The table fell over, the lamp on it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes .


The other police officer tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.


Meanwhile, neighbors saw the burning drapes and called in the fire department.  The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street . The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the power, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out) .



Time passed! Both the men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and all was right with their world .



A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night.

The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.

 
And, that's when he shot her.

Monday, September 18, 2017

The Bottle of Wine

For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, or wish you weren't married, this is something to smile about the next time you see a bottle of wine:

Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side of the road.

bottle of wine indian

As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car and asked the Navajo woman if she would like a ride.

With a silent nod of thanks, the woman got into the car.

Resuming the journey, Sally tried in vain to make a bit of small talk with the Navajo woman.

The old woman just sat silently, looking intently at everything she saw,studying every little detail, until she noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Sally.



'What in bag?' asked the old woman.

Sally looked down at the brown bag and said, 'It's a bottle of wine, I got it for my husband.'

The Navajo woman was silent for another moment or two.

Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said:

'Good trade…'

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Mouse in the House

Found this on Facebook and just had to share! Open-mouthed smile


Okay so I've been debating whether to post this because I'm convinced people will think I'm an incapable human being at life and adulthood but I've figured they're right and I may as well.


Today I saw a mouse in my sons room.

A mouse.

Stewart Little has decided to come in my house and set up camp near my sons drawers. (Not his pants American people, his clothes drawer thing)

I saw it and I froze

And it was the kinda freeze that you feel like you shouldn't even breathe. Where your air escapes your lungs.


I'm trying to find my pulse again when my daughter decided to strut into the room with her toddler swag and I screamed no! And it wasn't just any no. It was the loudest noooooooooooooooooooooo I've ever made in my life.

So I shut the door and I leave little Jerry (Tom's mate) to his own devices.

 
I decided to call my husband because there's a mouse in the house, and when there is a mouse in the house other than blow torching the house down there isn't much in the way of rational thinking.

 
He answers the phone and I say "mouse" I stutter because I'm fucking terrified. This is no Mickey Mouse okay. This is ratatouille but smaller and he isn't making some delicious soup, he's gonna spray out pebble poo and make babies everywhere and in my sons ears and they'll crawl in my mouth... mouse in my mouth!!!

"Huh?" He says

"Mouse in house" I say still shaken

"Cat in hat" he replies.

"No babe, there's a mouse in Luca's room! You need to come home NOW and take it outside!"

"Oh Bub you just take it outside, or just kill it"

"Kill it???"

Obviously this guy hasn't seen the movie 'Witches' where the witch turns into a mouse after eating soup and gets stomped on by the chef and green pus sprays out.


"There are children in the house, your children. You need to come here. I can't save them"

He laughs. He thinks I'm joking.

This face isn't joking. This face is scared that this mouse is going to radio the rescuers and call his other mice friends to come and have a pebble poo party orgy. NOT ON MY WATCH MOUSE. Not on my watch.

But of course he can't see my face because he's on the phone.

"Okay I'm being serious there's a mouse in the house and I'm FREAKING THE F OUT" I actually did swear but I'll try and be cool in the post. Pretty sure I called the mouse the C word.


"Where is it?" He asks

"In Luca's room"

"Where?"

"I dunno I'll open the door"


I open the door so slowly...inch by inch in snail speed, so slow that I can hear my husband asking if I'm still there. Lol

And it's there. In the same spot.

"It's dead!!!!!" I shut the door.


Oh my lord the mouse is dead. I have a DEAD mouse in my house. I start to cry a little bit

"It's dead... it never had a chance to live its life"

"Babe just go scoop it up with a piece of paper and put it in the bin. I have to go to a meeting"

 
So I hung up on him. Because obviously I'm alone in this. I'm alone and I need to be the brave one... so I take a couple of swigs of whiskey and say "okay Laura, today is the day you will fight your biggest fear in life and remove a dead mouse from your house"

 
I said this about 10 times in the mirror before and slapped myself a few times before I bolted down the door and went charging in like a knight in shining armour with a piece of paper screaming like the warrior woman I am and charge up onto this dead mouse in my house and I realise ...

I realise it's not a mouse.

No, not a mouse at all...

It's a tiny leopard...

A tiny toy leopard.

 
I nod to myself and say "we shall never tell a soul about this"

My husband got home 4 hours later and asked me how I went...."I said mate, I handled that shit"

 
Well now the mouse is outta the bag...

 
Pic of the bastard in comments.

mouse in the house


Friday, September 15, 2017

Watch out folks…

Another good one from our Meredith's Jack.

We may laugh but it will come to this as they already know more than enough about our life now.

Hello! Gordon's Pizza?
No sir, it is Google Pizza.

So, I have the wrong number?
No sir, Google bought Gordon's Pizza.

OK. Take my order please…
Well sir, you want the usual?

The usual? How do you know me?
According to your caller ID, the last 12 times, you ordered pizza with cheese, sausage, thick crust…

OK! OK! That's it.
Sir, may I suggest to you this time ricotta cheese, arugula with sun-dried tomatoes?

No, I hate vegetables.
But your cholesterol is high!

How do you know?
Through the Lab subscriber's guide. We have the results of your blood tests for the last 7 years.

Okay, but I want my regular pizza, I already take medicine.
But sir, you have not taken your medicine regularly. Four months ago, you only purchased a box with 30 tablets at Drugsale Network.

I bought more from another drugstore.
It is not showing on your credit card.

I paid in cash.
But you did not withdraw that much cash according to your bank statement.

I have other sources of cash.
This is not showing on your last Income-Tax return, unless you got it from an undeclared source.

WHAT THE HELL? Enough! I'm sick of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp. I'm going to an Island without Wi-Fi or internet. Where there are no cell phones or satellites to spy on me.
I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport, as it has expired 5 weeks ago!

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Signs A Man Respects You

11 Signs A Man Respects You In A Relationship


clip_image002


“Respect is not an option in a relationship. It is a requirement.” ~ Anon. 



Respect is defined as “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.”


People with qualities that are “good, valuable, or important” is another way of describing respect.

Respecting someone’s humanity is perhaps the best kind of respect we can give (and receive.) How much more, then, should we respect someone who has given us their heart?

Regarding respect and relationships, it isn’t possible to have one without the other. The two qualities are mutually inclusive in every healthy relationship.

In this article, we list and discuss 11 signs that the man you’re in a relationship with respects you. (This writer can imagine the number of Facebook tags this one’s gonna get!)

Let’s get started!


1. HE IS ENCOURAGING
Quite simply, a man who loves and respects you wants what you want. He desires his woman to be the best possible version of herself; something that not only makes you feel good but him as well. He may have an opinion on the matter, but he won’t dissuade you from taking any positive step in your life.

 
2. HE RESPECTS YOUR TIME AND HOW YOU SPEND IT
Another sign of a healthy relationship is respect for each other’s time – no matter if it’s time spent together or apart. Concerning the former, a respectful man is reliable when it comes to yours (and others) time. He is rarely late; when he is, he has a good explanation. When you need some time, for whatever reason, he is considerate and respectful.
(Note: spending over an hour in the bathroom may be an exception to this rule.)

 
3. HE DOESN’T GET JEALOUS
He’s devoted himself to you and is confident in your devotion to him. As such, a man who respects you doesn’t get jealous. This quality also speaks to the man’s self-confidence – something (sadly) that is absent in too many. Comment on Brad Pitt’s abs all you want, ladies!

 
4. HE DOESN’T TRY TO CONTROL YOU
Controlling behavior reeks of insecurity and, of course, disrespect. As mentioned, thoughtful men are neither of these things. A respectful man who loves you wouldn’t even contemplate taking any action that could be considered controlling. Enough said.

 
5. YOUR OPINIONS ARE TAKEN SERIOUSLY
Opinions are a matter of individual perspective, and should always be respected. A respectful man actively listens and responds to your opinion. Moreover, the man is interested in what you have to say, regardless of whether he agrees or disagrees.

 
Speaking of which…
someday someone
 
6. HE DOESN’T ESCALATE DISAGREEMENTS
At the risk of sounding overtly obvious, every relationship has disagreements and arguments. One sign of a real man is respect – and he’s never inclined to intensify any disagreement or argument. He appreciates and respects the differences just as he does the similarities. Aside from demonstrating his respect, the ability to “agree to disagree” shows his strength and character.

 
7. HE’S AN “HONEST ABE”
It can be difficult to discern whether or not someone is completely honest with you. However, a man who deeply respects his woman considers any dishonest behavior abhorrent. If he says or does something he perceives inaccurate, he’ll say so.

 
8. HE DOESN’T SECOND-GUESS YOU
A healthy relationship requires two people to commit themselves entirely – to be selfless. A man who respects you (and vice-versa) will not ignorantly cast doubt upon your choices or judgment. He understands that you possess an admirable ability to think for yourself; otherwise, he wouldn’t be with or respect you to such a high degree.

 
9. HE’LL DISCUSS THE RELATIONSHIP’S FUTURE
Some men have the impulse to evade discussing “the future.” Perhaps they’re not quite prepared for topics that you may bring up – and this may scare them. But a man that respects you will actively listen to your perspective on the future and provide honest feedback, even if it’s not quite what you were seeking. If he’s ready for the next step, he’ll tell you. If he’s not ready, he’ll still tell you.

 
10. HE SPENDS A GOOD AMOUNT OF TIME WITH YOU
A man who respects you willingly allocates a good amount of time making sure you’re happy. If you enjoy certain activities, he knows it and will go out of his way to make it happen. Even if he’s busy, a respectful man will sacrifice time he could spend elsewhere – at work, hanging out with friends, etc. – for you to know that you’re a priority.

 
11. HE RESPECTS OTHERS
“Others” may be your family, your social circle, or a complete stranger. The respect a man shows to others is equally as important to the respect he shows you. For those in the early phases of a relationship, observing how your man treats others is one of the best indications of his real character.

Courtesy of Power of Positivity

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Exercise for Pregnant Women

Another very good one from our Meredith's Jack.

The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.
 
The instructor said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial - strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surfaces, like a grass path."

"Gentlemen, remember -- you're in this together. It wouldn't hurt you to go walking with her. In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both."

 
The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this information. After a few moments a man, name unknown, at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand.
 
"Yes?" said the Instructor.
 
"I was just wondering if it would be all right, if she carries a golf bag?"
 

Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it? Smile with tongue out

(THIS LEVEL OF SENSITIVITY CAN'T BE TAUGHT)

Monday, September 11, 2017

New Teacher

Another goody from our Meredith's Jack. Open-mouthed smile 


After retiring from the Marine Corps, a former Drill Instructor Sergeant took a job as a high school teacher.


Just before the school year started, he injured his back. He was required to wear a light plaster cast around the upper part of his body. Fortunately, the cast fit snugly under his shirt and wasn't noticeable when he wore his suit jacket.



On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school. The smart-aleck punks, having already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery of him and he knew they would be testing his discipline in the classroom.



Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher opened the window wide and sat down at his desk, he looked around the room and made eye contact with each and every student.


A strong breeze through the window made his tie flap. He picked up a stapler and stapled the tie to his chest.



Dead Silence.



The rest of the school year went very smooth…


marines

Sunday, September 10, 2017

I Will Always Remember

I share the following every year as a reminder…we must never forget!  Never fails to brings tears to my eyes every time I read it. 
 
This year it is even more heartbreaking for me as I was on the phone with my brother and we were both watching when the plane went into the second tower…I will never forget that moment.


You say you will never forget where you were when you heard the news on September 11, 2001.

Neither will I.

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled room with a man who called his wife to say "Good-bye." I held his fingers steady as he dialed. I gave him the peace to say, "Honey, I am not going to make it, but it is OK...I am ready to go."
I was with his wife when he called as she fed breakfast to their children.  I held her up as she tried to understand his words and as she realized he wasn't coming home that night.
I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a woman cried out to Me for help.  "I have been knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!" I said.  "Of course I will show you the way home -- only believe on Me now."
I was at the base of the building with the Priest ministering to the injured and devastated souls. I took him home to tend to his Flock in Heaven. He heard my voice and answered.
I was on all four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayer.  I was with the crew as they were overtaken.  I was in the very hearts of the believers there, comforting and assuring them that their faith has saved them.
I was in Texas, Kansas, London.  I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news.  Did you sense Me?
I want you to know that I saw every face.  I knew every name -- though not all know Me.
Some met Me for the first time on the 86th floor.
Some sought Me with their last breath.
Some couldn't hear Me calling to them through the smoke and flames; “Come to Me... This way... take My hand."
Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me.
But, I was there.
I did not place you in the Tower that day.  You may not know why, but I do.
However, if you were there in that explosive moment in time, would you have reached for Me?
September 11, 2001, was not the end of the journey for you.  But someday your journey will end and I will be there for you as well.
Seek Me now while I may be found.
Then, at any moment, you know you are "ready to go."
I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.
God

During the next 60 seconds, please stop whatever you are doing, and take this opportunity (really, just 1 minute) to say an "Our Father" for the families of all those who lost their lives and the responders who risked their lives due to the events of September 11, 2001:
Our Father who art in Heaven,
Hallowed be Thy Name,
Thy Kingdom come,
Thy will be done,
On Earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day
Our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.
For Thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, forever and ever. Amen.

Please don't forget to give thanks for your family and friends!

faces of the fallen
This picture is comprised of the photos of all those who were lost.

9-11 flag with quote
honoring 9-11 rescue dogs

the day the NY skyline was scarred forever


This is especially poignant for me and sever others this year...





tears in the eye

Friday, September 8, 2017

Genius Sex Moves

9 Genius Sex Moves to Try on Your Man This Fall
 He'll be falling all over himself, literally.
 
1. The "Sweater Weather."
Surprise your man by wearing a super-soft fuzzy fall sweater...AND NOTHING ELSE. You'll be soooo touchable.
 
2. The "Extra Spicy Pumpkin Latte."
Warm your mouth with some pumpkin-flavored coffee before going south *wink wink*. To add even more spice, let a little dribble out of the corners of your mouth first; the visual of dripping liquid is VERY sexy.
 
3. The "Boot Knocker."
Blindfold your man and then gently slide his dick in and out of your favorite boots. The rough and soft textures will be crazy hot and sexual.
 
4. The "Sweet Potato Smash."
Smash up some sweet potatoes and leave them on the kitchen table with a note that reads "Enjoy!" He'll know what to do with them.
 
5. The "Thanks-for-giving."
Give your man a special Thanksgiving treat with this classic move: During sex, suddenly yell, "I'M A DEAD FALL TREE," then stay very still for the remainder, letting him do all the work. Afterward, simply whisper, "Thanks...for giving."
 
6. The "Halloween Surprise."
Put on your fave halloween mask and surprise your man with a morning blow job! So easy and effective.
 
7. The "Leaf Pile."
Rake up some dirty leaves from your yard and pile them onto his bed. Hide in it nakie until he's nearby, then jump out and yell, "I'M FALLING FOR YOU!" He'll be so turned on he might faint. Extra points if you bring some squirrels in with you.
 
8. The "Candied Apple."
Using your favorite candy apple recipe, heat up some burning hot caramel on the stove. Act like you're about to pour it on his butt, then quickly pull out some apples and say, "JK JK JK JK." But then pour it on his butt.
 
9. The "Sexy Foliage."
Go hide in the woods for the next few months, only communicating by leaving him ominous voicemails of forest animals chattering. Eventually lose contact with him and everything you knew before. Become a forest enchantress. This is your life now. Fuck society.
 
*This article is for entertainment purposes only. Please don't pour burning caramel on your loved ones. 😹
 
Courtesy of BuzzFeed

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Flat Tire

II shared something similar several years ago but this was so good, I had to share it again.   Another goody from our Meredith's Jack. Winking smile 


FOR ALL THE LADIES I KNOW THAT DRIVE ALONE!

I had a flat tire on the 401 yesterday; so, I pulled over, got out of the car and opened my trunk. I took out my cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so lifelike you wouldn't believe it!

Just as I had hoped, cars started slowing down looking at the men which made it much safer for me to work on the side of the road.

 
People honked and waved, and it wasn't long before a police car pulled up behind me.

He wanted to know what the heck I was doing so I calmly explained that I was changing my flat.
 

He told me he could see that, but demanded to know what the heck my cardboard men were doing standing at the rear of my car.

I couldn't believe he didn't know!
 

“Well,:” I explained to the angry Policeman…
“They're my Emergency Flashers!!!”
 

He laughed, I laughed, we laughed, He laughed!!!
 
emrgency flashers

Nice view isn’t it.  Smile with tongue out

I go to court in AUGUST.
(Damn Police. No sense of humor.)

Wednesday, September 6, 2017

States

I have an inbox full of goodies from our Meredith's Jack so you will be seeing a lot more from him. Winking smile  BTW...I didn't fact check any of this so if it's wrong...just enjoy it for the giggle.

This is really interesting and quite surprising at times…
 
STATES AND WHAT THEY ARE FAMOUS FOR (DID YOU EVER IMAGINE?) 
 
ALABAMA...Was the first state to have 9-1-1, started 1968.
ALASKA...One out of every 64 people has a pilot's license.
ARIZONA...Is the only state in the continental U.S. that does not follow Daylight Savings Time.
ARKANSAS...Has the only active diamond mine in the U.S.
CALIFORNIA...Its economy is so large that if it were a country, it would rank seventh in the entire world.
COLORADO...In 1976 it became the only state to turn down the Olympics.
CONNECTICUT...The Frisbee was invented here at Yale University
DELAWARE...Has more scientists and engineers than any other state.
FLORIDA...At 874.3 square miles, Jacksonville is the largest city in the U.S.
GEORGIA...It was here, in 1886, that pharmacist John Pemberton made the first vat of Coca-Cola....interesting!
HAWAII...Hawaiians live, on average, five years longer than residents of any other state.
IDAHO...TV was invented in Rigby, Idaho, in 1922.
ILLINOIS...Has a Governor in jail, one pending jail, and is the most corrupt state in the union!
INDIANA...Home to Santa Claus, Indiana, which gets a half million letters for Santa every year.
IOWA...Winnebago R.V.s get their name from Winnebago County. Also, it is the only state name that begins with 2 vowels.
KANSAS...Liberal, Kansas has an exact replica of the house in "The Wizard of Oz".
KENTUCKY...Has more than $6 billion in gold underneath Fort Knox.
LOUISIANA...Has parishes instead of counties because they were originally Spanish church units.
MAINE...It is so large that it covers as many square miles as the other five New England states combined.
MARYLAND...The Ouija board was created in Baltimore in 1892… Bet you didn't know that!
MASSACHUSETTS…The Fig Newton is named after Newton, Massachusetts.
MICHIGAN...Fremont, home to Gerber, is the baby food capital of the world.
MINNESOTA…Bloomington's Mall of America is so big, that if you spent 10 minutes in each store, you'd be there almost four days.
MISSISSIPPI…President Teddy Roosevelt refused to shoot a bear here. The most lied about state in the nation.
MISSOURI...Is the birthplace of the ice cream cone.
MONTANA…A sapphire from Montana is in the Crown Jewels of England .
NEBRASKA...More triplets are born here than in any other state.
NEW HAMPSHIRE...Birthplace of Tupperware, invented in 1938 by Earl Tupper.
NEW JERSEY...Has the most shopping malls in one area in the world.
NEW MEXICO...Smokey the Bear was rescued from a 1950 forest fire here.
NEW YORK...Is home to the nation's oldest cattle ranch, started in 1747 in Montauk...Surprised?
NORTH CAROLINA…Home of the first Krispy Kreme doughnut.
NORTH DAKOTA... Rigby, North Dakota, is the exact geographic center of North America .
OHIO...The hot dog was invented here in 1900.
OKLAHOMA...The grounds of the state capital are covered by operating oil wells.
OREGON...Has the most ghost towns in the country.
PENNSYLVANIA...The smiley : ) was first used in 1980 by computer scientists at Carnegie Mellon University .
RHODE ISLAND...The nation's oldest bar, the White Horse Tavern, opened here in 1673.
SOUTH CAROLINA...Sumter County is home to the world's largest gingko farm.
SOUTH DAKOTA...Is the only state that's never had an earthquake.
TENNESSEE...Nashville' s Grand Ole Opry is the longest running live radio show in the world.
TEXAS…Dr. Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. The hamburger was invented in Arlington in 1906.
UTAH...The first Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant opened here in 1952.
VERMONT…Montpelier is the only state capital without a McDonald's.
VIRGINIA…Home of the world's largest office building, The Pentagon.
WASHINGTON...Seattle has twice as many college graduates as any other state.
WASHINGTON D.C...Is the first planned capital in the world
WEST VIRGINIA...Had the world's first brick paved street, Summers Street, laid in Charleston in 1870.
WISCONSIN...The ice cream sundae was invented here in 1881 to get around Blue Laws prohibiting ice cream from being sold on Sunday. Also the American Water Spaniel was created there and is the state dog.
WYOMING...Was the first state to allow women to vote.

I hope you enjoyed this. Just proving no matter how old you are you can still learn new things~

Sunday, September 3, 2017

Labor Day 2017

long holiday weekend

Although I shared the following information last year, I think it’s very much worth sharing again.

Labor Day has been celebrated as a national holiday paying tribute to working men and women in the United States and Canada since 1894.

The first Labor Day parade occurred 5 September 1882, in New York City.  The workers' unions chose the first Monday in September because it was halfway between Independence Day in July and Thanksgiving in November.

Some states designated Labor Day as a holiday before President Grover Cleveland signed a law designating the first Monday in September as the federal holiday known as Labor Day nationwide.
If you want to know more about Labor Day in the United States…what it means, where it originated, etc., this article http://www.dol.gov/laborday/history.htm has a lot of good information.

safe and happy labor day 2

success prosperity

Saturday, September 2, 2017

Never Tolerate

10 Critical Things You Should Never Tolerate In a Relationship
 
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Your relationship, whether it be romantic or not, should make you feel excited and happy about life, not stifled, repressed, or unloved. Many people stay in unhappy relationships just because they fear being alone or can’t picture their life without the person, even if their current situation doesn’t truly fulfill them anymore.

Everyone deserves respect, compassion, and love in relationships, but if you don’t feel as though your partner gives those to you, you might want to rethink your relationship with him or her.
 
HERE ARE 10 CRITICAL THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER TOLERATE IN A RELATIONSHIP:
 
1. DISRESPECTFUL LANGUAGE
First and foremost, a healthy relationship begins with respect for both individuals. You should never tolerate someone who calls you names, puts you down, or makes you feel uncomfortable in any way. Even if you’re having a heated argument, it doesn’t give your partner the right to treat you with disrespect just because they can’t control their language.
 
2. AN OVERLY CONTROLLING PARTNER
If you have a partner who can’t let you out of his or her sight without freaking out or thinking you’ll break their trust, then this should definitely raise some red flags. You should never tolerate someone who feels the need to control every aspect of your life and your relationship. According to an article on psychologytoday.com, Andrea Bonior, Ph.D., says,

“Toxic relationships can sneak up on almost anyone. And controlling behavior on the part of a partner knows no boundaries—people of any age, gender, sexual orientation or socioeconomic status can be in controlling relationships, playing either role.”
 
3. A BREACH OF TRUST
Aside from respect, mutual trust must exist in a relationship for it to thrive. If you can’t trust your partner, you should either talk to them about it, or end the relationship before you get in too deep. Both partners must feel totally comfortable, open, and supported in the relationship for it to work, and a lack of trust will kill an otherwise healthy relationship.
 
4. INCESSANT NEEDINESS
Of course, feeling wanted and needed in a relationship is normal, but it can go overboard if you’re not careful. Most people enjoy having a partner that asks them for help with certain things or just needs a hug or a shoulder to cry on sometimes. These things are perfectly normal – what isn’t normal, however, is an overly clingy, needy partner who can’t seem to do anything without you. It’s important to feel like you can live on your own without your SO around 24/7, so a partner who doesn’t display any independence should be a red flag to you.
 
5. FEELING LIKE YOU DON’T COME FIRST
While there are other important parts of life outside of relationships, your partner should prioritize you over other things. If he or she hangs out with friends more than you, for example, that shows they don’t take the commitment very seriously. Never tolerate someone who doesn’t take the time to make you feel special – you deserve someone who will treat you like the king or queen that you are.
 
6. NEGATIVITY
Now, of course negativity will be a part of any relationship in life, but it shouldn’t take precedence over a positive attitude. A negative outlook on life will translate into negative thoughts, and ultimately, a negative mind. People who focus on the negative tend to have low energy, blame others for their problems, and in general, won’t be the most fun, inspiring people to hang around. Don’t ever settle for someone who displays such negativity about life – it will only drag you down in the process.
 
7. EMOTIONAL UNAVAILABILITY
Your partner should be emotionally available; otherwise, you won’t be able to have a successful relationship with them. If they feel insecure or shy about displaying emotions, then they probably have deep-seated issues to work out before they can partake in a healthy, thriving relationship.
 
8. A PARTNER WHO DOESN’T LISTEN
Both of you should feel comfortable talking honestly and openly to each other. If your partner regularly talks over you or makes you feel like your opinion or thoughts don’t matter, this means he or she doesn’t really value you as a person. And you should never tolerate this sort of behavior in a relationship.
 
9. SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T SUPPORT YOUR DREAMS
Your partner should also back you 150% when it comes to your dreams and goals. You should never tolerate someone who gets jealous or tries to undermine your success – a truly supportive partner will encourage you and help you every step of the way.
 
10. IRRESPONSIBILITY
Finally, you should never tolerate a partner who isn’t willing to pick up the slack and take care of business. Adult responsibilities aren’t fun by any means, but they should at least take care of the minimum amount of chores and responsibilities needed for survival, and not depend on you to do all the dirty work.
Courtesy of Power of Positivity

Friday, September 1, 2017

Simple Math

"A customer a few weeks ago wanted to return this hair coloring, and exchange it for a different color, right?   So I tell her, she can hand it and the receipt to me, and I can do it all in one transaction if she goes to get the one she wants and any other items she wants.

So she does, and comes back.

I do the return first because it makes the return slip that I stick in the register shorter and easier to deal with, and that way I also don't forget to do it.


The way our system lists returns is a negative value on the receipt. I think in this case it was -6.99.

That said, I still have to scan the one she's swapping it for, but it's also 6.99, which is a positive value so it all evens out, right?


Not according to her.

As far as she was concerned, I shouldn't have charged her for it at all.

And I could not get her to understand that it evens out to a zero value, even with the assistance of one of my coworkers helping explain.


She left, then she came back again, and went to cosmetics that time to try and get it corrected.


It took a manager with a calculator to finally convince her that yes, I did not charge her a value for it." (Source)


That 5.16 is not larger than 5.8.

I worked at a bank with a young coworker who thought that the staff interest rate on a term deposit of 5.8% was worse that the bank's standard rate at the time of 5.16%.

She also couldn't work out 10% of $200, even with a spreadsheet that someone made where all she had to do was enter the number 200 and then look and the large, colorful and well marked answer. (Source)


Customer: If the cucumbers are on sale 4 for $3 why should I be charged .75 cents for one?

Me: Ma'am the sale price IS .75

Customer: That's bulls--t, the other guy would give it to me for the sale price.  I want to talk to someone who knows what the hell they're talking about!

Me: Sure, let me get you a manager.


Manager: Hi ma'am what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Why the hell should I pay .75 cents for a cucumber that's on sale just because I don't want to buy 4 of them!

Manager: Ma'am if 4 cucumbers are $3 then 2 are $1.50 and one would be .75 cents.


ITS THIRD GRADE MATH... COME ON!!! (Source)

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Guess Who!

Hey y’all… Surprise! This is not a pre-scheduled post! It’s actually me!

I'm sorry for being MIA for so long...has been a rough few months and have caught myself hibernating quite a bit. Looking back, I probably should have postponed my surgery.  Trying to deal with my mother's grief and mine has been hard enough but add in attending therapy and trying physically recover is a bit much.  Now add in that we have had an unusually large amount of rain in this area this past month and I have a leak in my basement so have spent quite a bit of time cleaning up water. *sigh*  Thank the good Lord for my wet vac!

Thank you so much for all the wonderful and supportive prayers, messages, emails, cards and letters.  You will never know how much they have meant to me!  💜

Okay...here is a bit more in the way of updates...my mom is struggling...can't say I know of a mother who wouldn't be.  She broke my heart the other day when she informed me that my brother was the first think she thought of when she woke up and the last thing she thought of before going to sleep.  I speak with her on a daily basis and can tell how bad a day she's having by how early she starts phoning and how many calls come in that day.

Yes, I am also still struggling with my brother's death.  Since we were only 13 months apart in age and my dad was a pure D redneck with a capital R, we were raised more as twins and even though he was over the road so much, he would often call me when he was driving long stretches in western Kansas.

Now to my shoulder...yes it is still painful but I have regained quite a bit of my mobility even though I still have a ways to go.  According to my doctor and therapist, it will probably be a year before I am "fully" healed.  Unfortunately, I can't take that year off work so am scheduled to go back to work on Tuesday the 5th of September.  Will just have to take frequent breaks which will make for longer days but will get through it.

I originally thought I would go back and respond to all the past comments but don't think I can handle that.  If there are any specific messages and/or questions you left that you would like me to respond to, please let me know and I will address those.  I will be responding to all comments from today moving forward.

I am gonna try to start getting around to visiting everyone but again, am gonna have to take it slow and easy.  If you have a particular post you want me to come visit, just email me.

I completed one painting that was almost done prior to my shoulder getting so bad and have completed two other paintings recently.  If you want to see them, just click on the "My Artwork" in the sidebar.

Hugs and blessings to all y'all!  💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Now for your giggle of the day...