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Thursday, April 30, 2015
Tess was a precocious eight-year-old when she heard her Mom and Dad talking about her little brother, Andrew. All she knew was that he was very sick and they were completely out of money. They were moving to an apartment complex next month because Daddy didn’t have the money for the doctor’s bills and our house.
Only a very costly surgery could save him now and it was looking like there was no one to loan them the money. She heard Daddy say to her tearful Mother with whispered desperation, “Only a miracle can save him now.”
Tess went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jar from its hiding place in the closet. She poured all the change out on the floor and counted it carefully, Three times. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.
Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall’s Drug Store with the big Red Indian Chief sign above the door.
She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter.
That did it! “And what do you want?” the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice. “I’m talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven’t seen in ages,” he said without waiting for a reply to his question.
“Well, I want to talk to you about my brother,” Tess answered back in the same annoyed tone. “He’s really, really sick…and I want to buy a miracle.”
“I beg your pardon?” said the pharmacist.
“His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?”
“We don’t sell miracles here, little girl. I’m sorry but I can’t help you,” the pharmacist said, softening a little.
“Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn’t enough, I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs.”
The pharmacist’s brother was a well-dressed man. He stooped down and asked the little girl, “What kind of a miracle does your brother need?”
“I don’t know,” Tess replied with her eyes welling up. “I just know he’s really sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can’t pay for it, so I want to use my money.”
“How much do you have?” asked the man from Chicago.
“One dollar and eleven cents,” Tess answered barely audibly. “And it’s all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to.”
“Well, what a coincidence,” smiled the man. “A dollar and eleven cents — the exact price of a miracle for your little brother.”
He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said “Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let’s see if I have the kind of miracle you need.”
That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed without charge and it wasn’t long until Andrew was home again and doing well. Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place.
“That surgery,” her Mom whispered, “Was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?”
Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost…one dollar and eleven cents.
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
Oh no, bad news as the use of condoms are becoming popular! Keep using condoms ladies!
Whoa! Guys if you ever wondered if this could happen to you. . . looks like it can!
Yikes! Hint: don't DIY this sex toy in your woodshop!
Whatever possesses the minds of sadomasochistic lovers can literally kill them! Someone should write a safety manual!
One side effect of even one Viagra taken, is a racing heart as blood explodes through the veins. Can you image downing the whole bottle? This man must've literally blew up.
Shocking, right?! More shocking is, according to an article called "Zoophilia and the Law", bestiality is legal in 19 U.S. states and DC. There are also countries (such as Sweden) where it is legal.
Dildo Light Bulb
Geez! Some people see something phallic and ALL they can think about is putting it in their butts? Go figure…
Some pervertibles should not be perverted.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Monday, April 27, 2015
Sunday, April 26, 2015
Saturday, April 25, 2015
Starbucks fans everywhere are up in arms over this one.
On second thought, stay back.
The only thing I can say about this is, "ahhhhhhhh!"
What a Relief
Well there's something you don't see every day.
Here, Kitty Kitty
Seriously, what are the odds?
That is one nice set of wheels.
Ding, ding, ding!
Monkey see, monkey do.
The Real You
No comment necessary.
How didn't anyone see this coming?
That's just plain mean.
That guy probably has this picture framed in his house.
Down goes Frazier.
What a great message to our youth.
Well, this is awkward.
What terrible, terrible placement.
Decisions, decisions, decisions...
They couldn't find a better spot for that?
Join the Fun
That doesn't look like much fun to me.
Friday, April 24, 2015
Like do penguins have knees
Yes it turns out we do in fact have knees.
Not that you would know...