As I’ve said before, I really believe this started out as a big joke with DST meaning for Dumb and Stupid Time and the government went for it!
Showing posts with label Dumb Laws. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dumb Laws. Show all posts
Saturday, November 5, 2016
DST Fall 2016
As I’ve said before, I really believe this started out as a big joke with DST meaning for Dumb and Stupid Time and the government went for it!
Thursday, August 25, 2016
Crazy Laws
Here are some crazy laws you could inadvertently break…some I’ve shared before and some are new to me. 
In North Carolina, bingo games cannot last more than 5 hours.
In Gainesville, GA, you MUST eat fried chicken with your hands. Any other method is illegal.
You can't wrestle bears in Alabama.
In Paulding, OH, policeman can bite dogs…but only if they think it will calm the dog down.
A man may not give his fiancée a box of candy weighing more than 50 lbs. in Idaho.
In Washington State, you can't buy meat on Sundays.
Don't sing off-key in North Carolina…it's illegal!
In Eureka, NV, you can't kiss a woman if you have a mustache.
If you want to take a picture of a rabbit between January and April in Wyoming, you need a permit.
It's illegal to harass Bigfoot in Washington State.
If you cut down a cactus in Arizona, you could get up to 25 years in prison.
In Quitman, GA, chickens are not allowed to cross the road.
Marriage between cousins is illegal in Utah…if they're younger than 65.
You can't sell your eyeballs in Texas.
If you've eaten garlic or onions, you can't attend a public event in Indiana for the next four hours.
In Minneapolis, MN, you're not allowed to drive red cars down Lake Street.
The punishment for stealing soap in Arizona is to wash yourself until the bar of soap is gone.
In Rhode Island, it's illegal to sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer...on a Sunday.
In Delaware, it's a misdemeanor to sell or barter the fur of a domestic dog or cat.
You need a permit to feed garbage to pigs in Arizona.
Every operator of an underground coal mine in Ohio must provide "adequate supply" of toilet paper with each toilet.
If your frog dies during a frog-jumping contest in California, you can't eat it.
In Iowa, it's a misdemeanor to try to pass off margarine as butter.
Vending machines that dispense non-latex condoms are illegal in Maryland.
In Arkansas, it's illegal for a pinball machine to give more than 25 free games to a player who keeps winning.
You can't collect seaweed at night in New Hampshire.
If you guide a sheep onto train tracks in Missouri with the intent to injure the train, you can be fined up to $50,000.
In Indiana, liquor stores can't sell cooled soda or water, but they can sell UNCOOLED soda.
You can't hunt, trap, or intentionally harm an albino deer in Tennessee.
In North Carolina, bingo games cannot last more than 5 hours.
In Gainesville, GA, you MUST eat fried chicken with your hands. Any other method is illegal.
You can't wrestle bears in Alabama.
In Paulding, OH, policeman can bite dogs…but only if they think it will calm the dog down.
A man may not give his fiancée a box of candy weighing more than 50 lbs. in Idaho.
In Washington State, you can't buy meat on Sundays.
Don't sing off-key in North Carolina…it's illegal!
In Eureka, NV, you can't kiss a woman if you have a mustache.
If you want to take a picture of a rabbit between January and April in Wyoming, you need a permit.
It's illegal to harass Bigfoot in Washington State.
If you cut down a cactus in Arizona, you could get up to 25 years in prison.
In Quitman, GA, chickens are not allowed to cross the road.
Marriage between cousins is illegal in Utah…if they're younger than 65.
You can't sell your eyeballs in Texas.
If you've eaten garlic or onions, you can't attend a public event in Indiana for the next four hours.
In Minneapolis, MN, you're not allowed to drive red cars down Lake Street.
The punishment for stealing soap in Arizona is to wash yourself until the bar of soap is gone.
In Rhode Island, it's illegal to sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer...on a Sunday.
In Delaware, it's a misdemeanor to sell or barter the fur of a domestic dog or cat.
You need a permit to feed garbage to pigs in Arizona.
Every operator of an underground coal mine in Ohio must provide "adequate supply" of toilet paper with each toilet.
If your frog dies during a frog-jumping contest in California, you can't eat it.
In Iowa, it's a misdemeanor to try to pass off margarine as butter.
Vending machines that dispense non-latex condoms are illegal in Maryland.
In Arkansas, it's illegal for a pinball machine to give more than 25 free games to a player who keeps winning.
You can't collect seaweed at night in New Hampshire.
If you guide a sheep onto train tracks in Missouri with the intent to injure the train, you can be fined up to $50,000.
In Indiana, liquor stores can't sell cooled soda or water, but they can sell UNCOOLED soda.
You can't hunt, trap, or intentionally harm an albino deer in Tennessee.
Friday, March 11, 2016
DST Spring 2016
For those of you who ‘participate’ in this nonsense…
FYI, I really believe this started out as a big joke with DST meaning for Dumb and Stupid Time and the government went for it!
Sunday, July 12, 2015
Hysterical Laws
50 Hysterical Laws in America, One from Each State…
ALABAMA: You can’t wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
ALASKA: It’s against the law to wake bears for the purposes of taking a picture.
ARIZONA: It’s illegal to drive a car in reverse.
ARKANSAS: You’re not allowed to pronounce Arkansas incorrectly.
CALIFORNIA: You will be fined if you detonate a nuclear device.
COLORADO: People must not dress unbecoming of their sex.
CONNECTICUT: Scrabble is not to be played while politicians are giving an oration.
DELAWARE: You may not marry on a dare.
FLORIDA: Women who kill themselves by electrocution in a bathtub with a “self-beautification utensil” will be fined.
GEORGIA: You can’t keep ice cream in your back pocket on Sundays.
HAWAII: Everyone is required to own a boat.
IDAHO: Motorists or pedestrians may not scowl or grimace.
ILLINOIS: Midget tossing is illegal in bars, but is legal in other parts of the city if you have a permit.
INDIANA: Everyone is required to work on a public road six days a year.
IOWA: One-armed piano players must perform for free.
KANSAS: If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
KENTUCKY: It’s required that you register all nude people in your home.
LOUISIANA: It is an assault for a person wearing false teeth to bite someone.
MAINE: You can’t buy a car on Sunday unless it has plumbing.
MARYLAND: One cannot spit on the sidewalk.
MASSACHUSETTS: The sexual position “woman on top” is illegal.
MICHIGAN: It’s against the law to have sex in a car unless it’s parked on your own property.
MINNESOTA: You must list your date of death on tax forms.
MISSISSIPPI: A man must not seduce a woman by promising her marriage.
MISSOURI: Single men between 18 and 50 must pay a $1 tax.
MONTANA: Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party… and you can shoot them. (Today, we call that racism…)
NEBRASKA: It’s illegal to go whale fishing within the state.
NEVADA: A man can’t buy drinks for more than three people at a time.
NEW HAMPSHIRE: It’s illegal to show a movie before 2 pm.
NEW JERSEY: One cannot sell cabbage on Sundays.
NEW MEXICO: Idiots may not vote. Nor may insane people.
NEW YORK: You may not stick your thumb to your nose and wiggle your fingers at someone.
NORTH CAROLINA: Bingo games cannot last more than 5 hours.
NORTH DAKOTA: Beer and pretzels cannot be served at the same time.
OHIO: One cannot kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church.
OKLAHOMA: It’s illegal to make funny faces at dogs.
OREGON: Canned corn is not to be used as fishing bait.
PENNSYLVANIA: It’s a crime to tell a fortune-teller where to dig for buried treasure.
RHODE ISLAND: Lunacy is grounds for divorce.
SOUTH CAROLINA: You have to be at least 18 to play a pinball machine.
SOUTH DAKOTA: You can’t sleep in a cheese factory.
TENNESSEE: Crimes against nature are illegal.
TEXAS: Criminals must notify their victims 24 hours in advance of the nature of their crimes yet to be committed.
UTAH: Husbands are responsible for their wives’ criminal behavior in their presence.
VERMONT: Margarine must be served in triangle patties.
VIRGINIA: The chicken labor lobby has set the egg laying workday between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m.
WASHINGTON: All lollipops are banned.
WEST VIRGINIA: Roadkill may be taken home for dinner.
WISCONSIN: It’s illegal to serve margarine to prisoners.
WYOMING: It’s against the law to have sex while standing up in a walk-in meat freezer.
ALABAMA: You can’t wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
ALASKA: It’s against the law to wake bears for the purposes of taking a picture.
ARIZONA: It’s illegal to drive a car in reverse.
ARKANSAS: You’re not allowed to pronounce Arkansas incorrectly.
CALIFORNIA: You will be fined if you detonate a nuclear device.
COLORADO: People must not dress unbecoming of their sex.
CONNECTICUT: Scrabble is not to be played while politicians are giving an oration.
DELAWARE: You may not marry on a dare.
FLORIDA: Women who kill themselves by electrocution in a bathtub with a “self-beautification utensil” will be fined.
GEORGIA: You can’t keep ice cream in your back pocket on Sundays.
HAWAII: Everyone is required to own a boat.
IDAHO: Motorists or pedestrians may not scowl or grimace.
ILLINOIS: Midget tossing is illegal in bars, but is legal in other parts of the city if you have a permit.
INDIANA: Everyone is required to work on a public road six days a year.
IOWA: One-armed piano players must perform for free.
KANSAS: If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
KENTUCKY: It’s required that you register all nude people in your home.
LOUISIANA: It is an assault for a person wearing false teeth to bite someone.
MAINE: You can’t buy a car on Sunday unless it has plumbing.
MARYLAND: One cannot spit on the sidewalk.
MASSACHUSETTS: The sexual position “woman on top” is illegal.
MICHIGAN: It’s against the law to have sex in a car unless it’s parked on your own property.
MINNESOTA: You must list your date of death on tax forms.
MISSISSIPPI: A man must not seduce a woman by promising her marriage.
MISSOURI: Single men between 18 and 50 must pay a $1 tax.
MONTANA: Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party… and you can shoot them. (Today, we call that racism…)
NEBRASKA: It’s illegal to go whale fishing within the state.
NEVADA: A man can’t buy drinks for more than three people at a time.
NEW HAMPSHIRE: It’s illegal to show a movie before 2 pm.
NEW JERSEY: One cannot sell cabbage on Sundays.
NEW MEXICO: Idiots may not vote. Nor may insane people.
NEW YORK: You may not stick your thumb to your nose and wiggle your fingers at someone.
NORTH CAROLINA: Bingo games cannot last more than 5 hours.
NORTH DAKOTA: Beer and pretzels cannot be served at the same time.
OHIO: One cannot kill a housefly within 160 feet of a church.
OKLAHOMA: It’s illegal to make funny faces at dogs.
OREGON: Canned corn is not to be used as fishing bait.
PENNSYLVANIA: It’s a crime to tell a fortune-teller where to dig for buried treasure.
RHODE ISLAND: Lunacy is grounds for divorce.
SOUTH CAROLINA: You have to be at least 18 to play a pinball machine.
SOUTH DAKOTA: You can’t sleep in a cheese factory.
TENNESSEE: Crimes against nature are illegal.
TEXAS: Criminals must notify their victims 24 hours in advance of the nature of their crimes yet to be committed.
UTAH: Husbands are responsible for their wives’ criminal behavior in their presence.
VERMONT: Margarine must be served in triangle patties.
VIRGINIA: The chicken labor lobby has set the egg laying workday between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m.
WASHINGTON: All lollipops are banned.
WEST VIRGINIA: Roadkill may be taken home for dinner.
WISCONSIN: It’s illegal to serve margarine to prisoners.
WYOMING: It’s against the law to have sex while standing up in a walk-in meat freezer.
Courtesy of Young Cons
Friday, March 27, 2015
Not Illegal
Crazy things that incredibly aren’t illegal somewhere in the United States
How some of these things aren’t officially banned is beyond me. But in certain places all of this stuff is fair game.
Marrying your first cousin
In 11 states, including New York, New Jersey, Connecticut and Washington D.C. it’s OK to marry someone who has the same grandparents as you. Gross.
Getting drunk with your kids
In 2013, the Massachusetts State Supreme Judicial Court ruled that parents cannot be held criminally liable for giving alcohol to their children at home. Who knows, maybe that would help train kids early in life so they wouldn’t make bigger rookie mistakes as they got older. Maybe.
Driving while barefoot
Driving without your shoes is legal in all 50 states. The one caveat is if police find your lack of footwear somehow contributed to an accident you could get cited for negligent or reckless driving.
Now I really don’t see anything wrong with this…I drive barefoot quite a bit…especially in the summer.
Firing a missile
Don’t mind me while I fire my fucking MISSILE. In South Carolina it’s perfectly legal to fire a missile. You are required to have permission from the aeronautics division of the Department of Commerce, but otherwise have at it.
Works for me!
Bestiality
There are over a dozen states where it’s 100% legal for you to be intimate with an animal. Let me be clear, it’s frowned upon, and in no way should that idea ever come across your radar, BUT technically it’s not a crime.
Driving with sunglasses at night
“Some states do have laws against this, but Washington is not one of them,” Bellevue police spokesman Greg Grannis said. I mean, the temptation to look cool is just so hard to resist. You know that old song.
Secretly recording a phone call
Shady as it sounds, in the vast majority of U.S. states, the law only requires one participant in a conversation to know that it is being recorded.
Passing on a double yellow line
In Vermont it’s fine to pass on the double yellow line (unless a signpost specifically prohibits it). Again, I would highly advise against this.
Counting cards
If casinos catch you, most casinos will kick you out and never let you back in, but it’s not against the law. And in Atlantic City there’s nothing they can do.
Driving your tank to the grocery store
I kind of like that this is legal in ‘Merica. The only rules are the tank must have rubber tracks and not exceed normal rules of size, mirrors, lights, etc.. Awesome.
I want one!
Wearing a spaghetti strainer in your driver license photo
In 2014, a woman in Utah was allowed to wear a colander on her head during her driver’s license photo because it was considered a religious garment. Three other drivers–from California and Oklahoma–were allowed to do the same.
Owning a brown bear
Hey, anything Russia can do we can do better. And apparently capturing one of these dangerous creatures is legal in nine different states.
Owning a flamethrower
The kids love this one. It’s completely legal to purchase a flamethrower under federal law, and 40 states have no laws that prohibit owning the weapon.
Ooh…want one of these also!
Sending penis pics to people you know
In Georgia, there’s no law against sending people unwanted photos of your penis. Not like any of you folks would ever stoop to such a crass level. Right?
Turning your backyard into a gun range
In Florida, it’s completely legal to shoot small arms off in your backyard. The only restriction is that you can’t pop off any rounds over a house that is occupied or on a public street.
I shoot in my backyard also and I’m not in Florida.
Texting and driving
In West Virginia, it is legal for licensed drivers to text while operating a vehicle. SMART.
Now this is completely idiotic!
Getting spanked by a teacher
School corporal punishment is still allowed in 19 U.S. states.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck
This is an especially bad idea, BTW. I’ve seen people get seriously hurt doing this exact thing. However, according to the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, several states, including, Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Delaware, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kentucky, Minnesota, Mississippi, Montana, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Dakota, Vermont, Washington, West Virginia, and Wyoming have no laws about riding in the back of a pickup truck
Serving roadkill for dinner
Texas, California and Washington might not have much in common, and yet these are the only three states that made collecting and eating roadkill illegal. Otherwise, if you can kill it, you can grill it.
Going topless out in public
Only three U.S. states have actual laws against the public display of a female breasts: Utah, Indiana, and Tennessee.
Via Distractify
Courtesy of the Chive
Thursday, November 20, 2014
Passport Renewal
Another joke from our darlin’ Ami over at Ami's Starsong.
AUSTRALIAN LETTER - I think the sender might have been upset!
This is an actual letter sent to the DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) Immigration Minister. The Government tried desperately to censure the author, but got nowhere because every legal person who read it couldn’t stop laughing!
Dear Mr. Minister,
I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.
How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a television set and golf clubs and condoms from them back in 1997, and yet the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?
For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?
My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years.
It is also on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off planes over the past 30 years.
It's also on all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.
Also... would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely bloody astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead !!!
SHIT! What do you people do with all this information we keep having to provide?
I apologize, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning.
Between you and me, I've had enough of all this bullshit!
You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my bloody address!
What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal arseholes working there!
And another thing, look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I can't even grow a beard for God's sakes. I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter. (Yes, my son interbred with a Kiwi girl). And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether or not I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? In the unlikely event I ever got the urge to do something weird to a sheep or a horse, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!
Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other side of Sydney , and get another bloody copy of my birth certificate - and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!
Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day?
Nooooo…that'd be too bloody easy and makes far too much sense.
You would much prefer to have us running all over the bloody place like chickens with our heads cut off, and then having to find some 'high-society' wanker to confirm that it's really me in the goddamn photo! You know the photo...the one where we're not allowed to smile?...you bloody morons.
Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen..
P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting someone in 'high-society' to confirm that it's me?
Well, my family has been in this country since before 1820! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor. (You do remember the Eureka Stockade!)
I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army for something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances. I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL...Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.
However, your rules require that I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am; you know...someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN BLOODY PAKISTAN!...a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers - and are suspended from the Commonwealth and United Nations for not having the "right sort of government"...
You are all pen-pushing paper-shuffling bloody idiots!
Yup…I would have to agree…the sender is just a tad bit upset. *snicker*
AUSTRALIAN LETTER - I think the sender might have been upset!
This is an actual letter sent to the DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) Immigration Minister. The Government tried desperately to censure the author, but got nowhere because every legal person who read it couldn’t stop laughing!
Dear Mr. Minister,
I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.
How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a television set and golf clubs and condoms from them back in 1997, and yet the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?
For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?
My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years.
It is also on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off planes over the past 30 years.
It's also on all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.
Also... would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely bloody astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead !!!
SHIT! What do you people do with all this information we keep having to provide?
I apologize, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning.
Between you and me, I've had enough of all this bullshit!
You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my bloody address!
What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal arseholes working there!
And another thing, look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I can't even grow a beard for God's sakes. I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter. (Yes, my son interbred with a Kiwi girl). And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether or not I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? In the unlikely event I ever got the urge to do something weird to a sheep or a horse, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!
Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other side of Sydney , and get another bloody copy of my birth certificate - and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!
Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day?
Nooooo…that'd be too bloody easy and makes far too much sense.
You would much prefer to have us running all over the bloody place like chickens with our heads cut off, and then having to find some 'high-society' wanker to confirm that it's really me in the goddamn photo! You know the photo...the one where we're not allowed to smile?...you bloody morons.
Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen..
P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting someone in 'high-society' to confirm that it's me?
Well, my family has been in this country since before 1820! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor. (You do remember the Eureka Stockade!)
I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army for something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances. I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL...Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.
However, your rules require that I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am; you know...someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN BLOODY PAKISTAN!...a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers - and are suspended from the Commonwealth and United Nations for not having the "right sort of government"...
You are all pen-pushing paper-shuffling bloody idiots!
Yup…I would have to agree…the sender is just a tad bit upset. *snicker*
Saturday, November 1, 2014
Facebook Funnies
Thought I’d share a few giggles with you that I have shared with my Facebook friends. Hope you enjoy!
Thursday, October 16, 2014
The Illegal Dam
Not sure if the following is true or not even though the note I received claims it is.
This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property.
It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania .
This guy's response is hilarious, but read State's letter before you get to the response letter.
Here is the actual response sent back by Mr. DeVries:
This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property.
It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania .
This guy's response is hilarious, but read State's letter before you get to the response letter.
SUBJECT: DEQ File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County
Dear Mr. DeVries:
It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:
Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream of Spring Pond.
A permit must be issued prior to the start of this type of activity. A review of the Department's files shows that no permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.
The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at downstream locations. We find that dams of this nature are inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted. The Department therefore orders you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31, 2006.
Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so that a follow-up site inspection may be scheduled by our staff. Failure to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity on the site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement action.
We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this matter. Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any questions.
Sincerely,
David L. Price
District Representative and Water Management Division.
Here is the actual response sent back by Mr. DeVries:
Re: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County
Dear Mr. Price,
Your certified letter dated 12/17/02 has been handed to me to respond to. I am the legal landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget Lane , Trout Run, Pennsylvania.
A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized) process of constructing and maintaining two wood "debris" dams across the outlet stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended that you call their skillful use of natures building materials "debris."
I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their dam project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their dam determination and/or their dam work ethic.
These are the beavers/contractors you are seeking. As to your request, I do not think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam permit prior to the start of this type of dam activity.
My first dam question to you is:
1. Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring Pond Beavers, or
2 do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to said dam request?
If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers, through the Freedom of Information Act, I request completed copies of all those other applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued.
(Perhaps we will see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.)
I have several concerns. My first concern is, aren't the beavers entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation -- so the State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The Department's dam concern that either one or both of the dams failed during a recent rain event, causing flooding, is proof that this is a natural occurrence, which the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling them dam names.
If you want the stream "restored" to a dam free-flow condition please contact the beavers -- but if you are going to arrest them, they obviously did not pay any attention to your dam letter, they being unable to read English.
In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right to build their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass is green and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I do to live and enjoy Spring Pond. If the Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection lives up to its name, it should protect the natural resources (Beavers) and the environment (Beavers' Dams).
So, as far as the beavers and I are concerned, this dam case can be referred for more elevated enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2006? The Spring Pond Beavers may be under the dam ice then and there will be no way for you or your dam staff to contact/harass them.
In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention to a real environmental quality, health, problem in the area. It is the bears! Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely believe you should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your step! The bears are not careful where they dump!
Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response to your dam office.
THANK YOU,
RYAN DEVRIES
& THE DAM BEAVERS
Thursday, August 28, 2014
Totally Random and Obscure Laws that Actually Exist
Stay Away From your Boyfriend
In the lovely state of West Virginia, "Unmarried couple who live together and “lewdly associate” with one another may face up to a year in prison". Fortunately it was repealed in 2010.
Imagine all of those unmarried rebels who lived together prior to 2010. Really on the edge type of characters. Hope they were all released from prison.
Leave the Cows Be
In good 'ol Mississippi, cattle rustling is punishable by hanging. Still? Maybe not. Bu the fact that this was ever a law is pretty outrageous.
There's likely a bunch of other old laws that were punishable by hanging. If this made the cut, imagine the rest. Oh dear.
Yeah, Your Elephant Pays Too
Leave it to Florida to come up with this gem "If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle".
Don't try to get out of paying your fines, you elephant riding renegades. You pay your dues just like the rest of us.
Garlic Breath Much?
Out in Oregon, ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon. While the sentiment is appreciated, perhaps this law overstates some personal boundaries?
Talk about separation of church and state, now the government is telling the church about personal hygiene.
NOT A BED
In Pennsylvania, one must never sleep on a refrigerator. There should be another law which states that anyone who needed the previous law explained to them should be arrested.
Reasons to no sleep on a refrigerator, because refrigerator. Simple enough?
No Lantern In Car, Please
In the great state of Alabama, "It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile." Those lantern-free cars are good to go.
Admittedly, no one should ever drive the opposite way on a one way street, or drive with a lantern in your car for that matter
No Stopping Here Any Time
In Little Rock, Arkansas "no one may suddenly stop their car in front of a McDonald's". Apparently, Arkansas takes its fast food joints VERY seriously.
Hard to imagine what the precedent for this was. Perhaps some crazy outlaw once came to a complete stop a a busy thrive thru, sending the town into downward spiral. Can't let that happen again.
Cemetery Joy Ride? NOPE
Believe it or not, Dunn, North Carolina felt the need to outlaw driving through their local cemeteries for pleasure. That's right, the next time you find yourself wanting to drag race through Veterans Memorial Cemetery, don't.
We have to wonder if it would legal to take a shortcut on through the cemetery on your way to work. After all, there is not pleasure in going to work.
No margarine
In the state of Wisconsin, it's illegal to serve butter substitutes in state prisons. It's actually healthier to have butter anyway, so our guess is the state legislators are watching out for their inmates?
DUI down
If you desperately must have personalized license plates, then don't get slapped with a DUI in New Jersey… or just don't drink and drive OR live in the state of New Jersey. The law there states that once you have been convicted of drunk driving, you may never again have personalized plates!
Take down the trimmings
Unfortunately, Maine as a state does not tolerate Christmas lights and wreaths past January 14th. It is illegal in Maine to have your Christmas decorations up past that date!
Bingo time
In North Carolina, grandma isn't allowed to play bingo for more than five hours. No marathon in this state!
Watch out!
We're not sure what kind of murderer would have the foresight to wear a bulletproof vest while committing his or her crime, but in the state of New Jersey, it's actually illegal to wear one when committing murder!
Party of…
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Maybe that's because you're not allowed to buy drinks for more than three people at a time. Yes, it's true -- that's an actual Nevada law!
Three little bears
In Alaska, hunting is a regular thing. Shooting bears is a regular thing. And it's totally ok for you to wake a bear up by shooting it (if you sorta miss). However, it's illegal in Alaska to wake a sleeping bear merely to take a picture of or with it!
No German fare
Beer and pretzels… that sure sounds like our kind of sports bar game night appetizer! Too bad we'll never visit North Dakota for this reason. It's illegal there for a restaurant to serve both pretzels and beer at the same time!
Arcade age
Do you think there's too much violence in video games for kids under the age of 18? Are you concerned that arcades are a bad influence? Well, there's a place for you -- South Carolina deems it illegal for anyone under the age of 18 to play a pinball machine.
No bear hug
In the state of Missouri, it is illegal to drive with an uncaged bear. We're assuming that this means it's ok to transport bears from zoo to zoo as long as they're in cages, but there's no random cab hopping for your friendly backyard guest!
Heavy hearts
In the state of Idaho, it's illegal for a man to give his love a box of candy weighing more than 50 pounds. So we guess there's no chance our lover in Idaho's gonna be sending us that fantasy jumbo Toblerone gift basket.
Drunk fish
In the state of Ohio, it's illegal to get a fish drunk. We're not sure why you would want to in the first place, but there it is!
In the lovely state of West Virginia, "Unmarried couple who live together and “lewdly associate” with one another may face up to a year in prison". Fortunately it was repealed in 2010.
Imagine all of those unmarried rebels who lived together prior to 2010. Really on the edge type of characters. Hope they were all released from prison.
Leave the Cows Be
In good 'ol Mississippi, cattle rustling is punishable by hanging. Still? Maybe not. Bu the fact that this was ever a law is pretty outrageous.
There's likely a bunch of other old laws that were punishable by hanging. If this made the cut, imagine the rest. Oh dear.
Yeah, Your Elephant Pays Too
Leave it to Florida to come up with this gem "If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle".
Don't try to get out of paying your fines, you elephant riding renegades. You pay your dues just like the rest of us.
Garlic Breath Much?
Out in Oregon, ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon. While the sentiment is appreciated, perhaps this law overstates some personal boundaries?
Talk about separation of church and state, now the government is telling the church about personal hygiene.
NOT A BED
In Pennsylvania, one must never sleep on a refrigerator. There should be another law which states that anyone who needed the previous law explained to them should be arrested.
Reasons to no sleep on a refrigerator, because refrigerator. Simple enough?
No Lantern In Car, Please
In the great state of Alabama, "It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile." Those lantern-free cars are good to go.
Admittedly, no one should ever drive the opposite way on a one way street, or drive with a lantern in your car for that matter
No Stopping Here Any Time
In Little Rock, Arkansas "no one may suddenly stop their car in front of a McDonald's". Apparently, Arkansas takes its fast food joints VERY seriously.
Hard to imagine what the precedent for this was. Perhaps some crazy outlaw once came to a complete stop a a busy thrive thru, sending the town into downward spiral. Can't let that happen again.
Cemetery Joy Ride? NOPE
Believe it or not, Dunn, North Carolina felt the need to outlaw driving through their local cemeteries for pleasure. That's right, the next time you find yourself wanting to drag race through Veterans Memorial Cemetery, don't.
We have to wonder if it would legal to take a shortcut on through the cemetery on your way to work. After all, there is not pleasure in going to work.
No margarine
In the state of Wisconsin, it's illegal to serve butter substitutes in state prisons. It's actually healthier to have butter anyway, so our guess is the state legislators are watching out for their inmates?
DUI down
If you desperately must have personalized license plates, then don't get slapped with a DUI in New Jersey… or just don't drink and drive OR live in the state of New Jersey. The law there states that once you have been convicted of drunk driving, you may never again have personalized plates!
Take down the trimmings
Unfortunately, Maine as a state does not tolerate Christmas lights and wreaths past January 14th. It is illegal in Maine to have your Christmas decorations up past that date!
Bingo time
In North Carolina, grandma isn't allowed to play bingo for more than five hours. No marathon in this state!
Watch out!
We're not sure what kind of murderer would have the foresight to wear a bulletproof vest while committing his or her crime, but in the state of New Jersey, it's actually illegal to wear one when committing murder!
Party of…
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Maybe that's because you're not allowed to buy drinks for more than three people at a time. Yes, it's true -- that's an actual Nevada law!
Three little bears
In Alaska, hunting is a regular thing. Shooting bears is a regular thing. And it's totally ok for you to wake a bear up by shooting it (if you sorta miss). However, it's illegal in Alaska to wake a sleeping bear merely to take a picture of or with it!
No German fare
Beer and pretzels… that sure sounds like our kind of sports bar game night appetizer! Too bad we'll never visit North Dakota for this reason. It's illegal there for a restaurant to serve both pretzels and beer at the same time!
Arcade age
Do you think there's too much violence in video games for kids under the age of 18? Are you concerned that arcades are a bad influence? Well, there's a place for you -- South Carolina deems it illegal for anyone under the age of 18 to play a pinball machine.
No bear hug
In the state of Missouri, it is illegal to drive with an uncaged bear. We're assuming that this means it's ok to transport bears from zoo to zoo as long as they're in cages, but there's no random cab hopping for your friendly backyard guest!
Heavy hearts
In the state of Idaho, it's illegal for a man to give his love a box of candy weighing more than 50 pounds. So we guess there's no chance our lover in Idaho's gonna be sending us that fantasy jumbo Toblerone gift basket.
Drunk fish
In the state of Ohio, it's illegal to get a fish drunk. We're not sure why you would want to in the first place, but there it is!
Courtesy of awesometakespractice.net
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Funny Laws
Corsets Not Allowed!
Merryville, Missouri prohibits women from wearing corsets. Why you may ask? The law states, "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male." Oh really? And of course, her “rights” or even “wishes” are not important.
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a mother and her daughter at the same time. Seems like they need to plan alternate date nights!
Ewwww
In Michigan, a law is on the books that threatens five years of imprisonment for any man who seduces and corrupts an unmarried girl. Something tells us this one doesn't get prosecuted all that often. Think the key is “seduces AND corrupts” so even if she is seduced…ya gotta prove she wasn’t previously corrupted.
In Willowdale, Oregon it is illegal for a man to curse during sex. No more naughty name calling! Oops!
In Mississippi, an act of "unnatural intercourse," if both parties voluntarily consent, can result in a maximum prison sentence of 10 years and fine of $10,000. Godspeed to whoever learns exactly what kind of intercourse Mississippi constitutes to be "unnatural." Yup…would definitely be interested in hearing their definition of “unnatural.”
In Fairbanks, Alaska, even the moose are not allowed to have sex in the streets! When two moose love each other very much... Did anyone inform the moose of this law? And just how is it enforced? Arrest that moose!
Some of these might be duplicates as these float around in emails but they are still funny.
Hope you enjoy!
Merryville, Missouri prohibits women from wearing corsets. Why you may ask? The law states, "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male." Oh really? And of course, her “rights” or even “wishes” are not important.
No Marriage for Me!
In Cali, Columbia it is a law for the bride's mother to be in the room to witness the act of sex on her wedding night. Mom in the room is definitely not a turn on. Good luck with that! Oh yes…I am sure that this is such a turn on for the bride and groom!Sex With Satan!
It is a law in Bakersfield, California that you must wear a condom when having sex with Satan. Apparently the spawn of Satan isn't welcome in Bakersfield! Can’t quite decide if they are saying Satan is gay or a female.Alternating Between Family Members
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a mother and her daughter at the same time. Seems like they need to plan alternate date nights!
Ewwww
Masturbation Can Result In Death!
In Indonesia it is illegal to masturbate and it is punishable by decapitation. How are the Indonesian masturbation police going to know? Do you report yourself? Better make sure all doors are locked and curtains closed tightly!Nevada Has a Tough Stance on Condoms
It is illegal to have sex without a condom in Nevada. Way to promote safe sex! As with so many of these laws, how are they gonna know?Wedding Day
In Oblong, Illinois it is illegal to make love while you are hunting or fishing on your wedding day. Better rethink that honeymoon camping trip! Alrighty then…Lips Off
In Florida, there is a law on the books that says a man may not kiss his wife's breasts. The Florida law that makes having sexual relations with a porcupine illegal is understandable...but no lip love for breasts? Come on, Florida! I really do have to wonder what was behind this law being written!
Art of Seduction
In Michigan, a law is on the books that threatens five years of imprisonment for any man who seduces and corrupts an unmarried girl. Something tells us this one doesn't get prosecuted all that often. Think the key is “seduces AND corrupts” so even if she is seduced…ya gotta prove she wasn’t previously corrupted.
Missionary or Miss Out
In North Carolina, the only acceptable sex position is missionary, and you may only engage in missionary-style sex when the shades are pulled. OMG…got a feeling that every single person in blog land has broken this law if they have been in North Carolina! LOLIf You Don't Have Anything Nice to Say...
In Willowdale, Oregon it is illegal for a man to curse during sex. No more naughty name calling! Oops!
Getting Unnatural in Mississippi
In Mississippi, an act of "unnatural intercourse," if both parties voluntarily consent, can result in a maximum prison sentence of 10 years and fine of $10,000. Godspeed to whoever learns exactly what kind of intercourse Mississippi constitutes to be "unnatural." Yup…would definitely be interested in hearing their definition of “unnatural.”
Turn Off That Meter
In Massachusetts, taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts. So…they could make love in the front seat of their taxi before or after their shifts?I Now Pronounce You Moose & Moose
In Fairbanks, Alaska, even the moose are not allowed to have sex in the streets! When two moose love each other very much... Did anyone inform the moose of this law? And just how is it enforced? Arrest that moose!
Courtesy of gizmopod.com
Some of these might be duplicates as these float around in emails but they are still funny.
Hope you enjoy!
Friday, January 3, 2014
Funny French Laws
And you thought that only the US had odd laws!
1. You Can Legally Marry a Dead Person
I can imagine your reactions already:
Wait, what?!
Um, gross...
That's... I... but... why?
Score! Time to move to France.
Okay, not so much the last one. But it's true! It is legal to marry a dead person in France. But they have some stipulations, of course! The couple has to have been engaged prior to the person's death, with obvious intent to go through with the wedding.
At least the corpse isn't getting married against his/her will, right?
2. No Jerry Lewis Masks For You
If you're planning a big Jerry Lewis-themed masquerade ball in Cannes, France, you might want to find a new theme!
Don't you know that wearing Jerry Lewis masks is illegal there? I know how common these parties are, but unless you want to pay a large fine, either cancel the shindig or find another location. Don't say we didn't warn you!
3. Hey There, Dollface
In France, it is illegal to sell dolls without human faces. That means your E.T. doll is illegal, my friend! Come on, though. Let's be serious. Do any dolls actually look human?
4. Onions Get the Right of Way
If you're walking along the street in Paris and you come upon a man carrying onions, get out of the way!
Onion-carrying garçons always get the right of way!
So I guess if you really want to get somewhere in a hurry, grab a pile of onions to speed up your trip!
5. Illegal For Women To Wear Trousers
In these modern times, you might think that most progressive societies have accepted that women like to wear pants. But in Paris, it is still illegal for women to wear trousers!
They have a few exceptions, like:
6. Illegal To Kiss on Railways
You know those adorable photos of people kissing on railroad tracks?
Well, you shouldn't try to have that photo shoot in France!
It is illegal to kiss on railways there.
This actually seems like a pretty practical law.
Would you want to be run over by a train because you were too busy sucking face to pay attention?
I think not!
7. Illegal To Take Photos of Police Officers
In Antibes, it is 100% illegal to take pictures of police officers or their vehicles.
If you're the type of person who hates to be photographed, this could be a strategic career move! It would be pretty cool to arrest people for going against your wishes, eh?
8. Pigs Named Napoleon
If you decide to live in France and buy a pet pig, make sure to abide by this important law:
Whatever you do, don't name it Napoleon!
If you do, you'll be breaking the law.
Why not stick with a more traditional name, like Gordy or Babe?
9. French Music on the Radio
If you're listening to the radio in France between the hours of 8am-8pm, don't expect to hear very much American music.
Why?
Because according to law, 70% of music played on the radio during those hours has to be performed by French artists.
10. Breathalyzer Tests
If you thought American DUI laws were harsh, just wait until you hear about this French law!
In France, every car must have a breathalyzer kit in the glove compartment at all times.
If a driver is found to not have one, he or she will get a fine of 11 euros!
1. You Can Legally Marry a Dead Person
I can imagine your reactions already:
Wait, what?!
Um, gross...
That's... I... but... why?
Score! Time to move to France.
Okay, not so much the last one. But it's true! It is legal to marry a dead person in France. But they have some stipulations, of course! The couple has to have been engaged prior to the person's death, with obvious intent to go through with the wedding.
At least the corpse isn't getting married against his/her will, right?
2. No Jerry Lewis Masks For You
If you're planning a big Jerry Lewis-themed masquerade ball in Cannes, France, you might want to find a new theme!
Don't you know that wearing Jerry Lewis masks is illegal there? I know how common these parties are, but unless you want to pay a large fine, either cancel the shindig or find another location. Don't say we didn't warn you!
3. Hey There, Dollface
In France, it is illegal to sell dolls without human faces. That means your E.T. doll is illegal, my friend! Come on, though. Let's be serious. Do any dolls actually look human?
4. Onions Get the Right of Way
If you're walking along the street in Paris and you come upon a man carrying onions, get out of the way!
Onion-carrying garçons always get the right of way!
So I guess if you really want to get somewhere in a hurry, grab a pile of onions to speed up your trip!
5. Illegal For Women To Wear Trousers
In these modern times, you might think that most progressive societies have accepted that women like to wear pants. But in Paris, it is still illegal for women to wear trousers!
They have a few exceptions, like:
- When a woman is riding a horse
- When a woman is riding a bike
6. Illegal To Kiss on Railways
You know those adorable photos of people kissing on railroad tracks?
Well, you shouldn't try to have that photo shoot in France!
It is illegal to kiss on railways there.
This actually seems like a pretty practical law.
Would you want to be run over by a train because you were too busy sucking face to pay attention?
I think not!
7. Illegal To Take Photos of Police Officers
In Antibes, it is 100% illegal to take pictures of police officers or their vehicles.
If you're the type of person who hates to be photographed, this could be a strategic career move! It would be pretty cool to arrest people for going against your wishes, eh?
8. Pigs Named Napoleon
If you decide to live in France and buy a pet pig, make sure to abide by this important law:
Whatever you do, don't name it Napoleon!
If you do, you'll be breaking the law.
Why not stick with a more traditional name, like Gordy or Babe?
9. French Music on the Radio
If you're listening to the radio in France between the hours of 8am-8pm, don't expect to hear very much American music.
Why?
Because according to law, 70% of music played on the radio during those hours has to be performed by French artists.
10. Breathalyzer Tests
If you thought American DUI laws were harsh, just wait until you hear about this French law!
In France, every car must have a breathalyzer kit in the glove compartment at all times.
If a driver is found to not have one, he or she will get a fine of 11 euros!
Courtesy of chacha.com
Monday, August 26, 2013
Crazy Laws That Really Exist!!!
Written permission…verbal won’t do! 
How about Tigers?
So if you want 4 Deer, you challenge someone you know is not going to accept?
I would be tempted to pay the fine just to see how this is accomplished!
So you can shoot a while driving down the 101 Highway?!?
How in the heck would they manage to do that anyway?!?
Only prohibited for 12 hours?
Guess they all have to go to one of the ‘border’ states! 
Okay…so I can throw a ‘good’ pickle in the street?
Oh I do like this law! 
I do enjoy my guns but…Seriously? Legal?
Oh good gravy!
Hope it’s also illegal to use one!
Only if it causes laughter…
And just how do they intend to collect this fine?
Not even gonna ask!
Courtesy of Its Ladies Night
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