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Sunday, November 1, 2015

Top Ten One Liners

1. Escalators don’t break down…they just turn into stairs.

2. “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing…except when you’re at a funeral.

3. I intend to live forever…or die trying.

4. We never knew he was a drunk…until he showed up to work sober.

5. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

6. A blind man walks into a bar…And a table, and a chair.

7. At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted?

8. Want to hear a pizza joke…nah, it’s too cheesy.  What about a construction joke?  Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one.  Did you hear the one about the rope? Skip it.  Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair?  Never mind, it’s too lame.

9. I used to be in a band, we were called ‘lost dog’. You probably saw our posters.

10. I childproofed the house…but they still get in!


14 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. That's a good one isn't it Minelle. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  2. LoL Cat, love these, I especially like No 10 too lol

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them Roz...think every parent has felt #10 sooner or later. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. Clever writing and thinking...love it.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them Abby. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. LOL. Brilliant Cat. Thanks.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome Ronnie...so happy you enjoyed them. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. Ha! Loved the one about the dog being adopted.

    Hugs from Ella

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is cute isn't it Ella. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. Thanks Sunny...happy you enjoyed them. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  7. Haha, love them all, thank you for the laugh, Cat.

    hugs

    Nina

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome Nina...happy you enjoyed them. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

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