Welcome to my little corner of the world where you never know what you will find! It could be anything from a joke to a funny picture to a personal rant to a favorite recipe to an awesome quote to any random "bright idea" that pops into my mind.
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I noticed that all the waiters in this New York restaurant carried two spoons in their vest pocket. Naturally, I was curious. I asked a waiter why.
"Sir, as a result of an efficiency study by the management, it was determined that the most frequently dropped silverware item was a spoon. Therefore, all the waiters carry two spoons so that the item can be instantly replaced."
As he was explaining that, I noticed a string hanging out of the fly of his pants. So, I asked about that.
"Sir, that's another efficiency study result. When we have to go to the bathroom, we use the string to pull ourselves out and aim. Therefore, we do not have to stop to wash our hands."
I replied, "I understand how you can get yourself out and aim, but how do you get yourself back in."
"Well," replied the waiter, "I don't know about the other guys, but I use the spoons!"
Hey Katie…many of your friends and family here in blogland wanted to let you know that you are loved, they are thinking of you along with sending lots of prayers and good wishes to you. We decided to put the messages and giggles into one post so you can bookmark it and come read at your leisure. Hope you enjoy.
Please know how much you are loved and respected in this caring community of friends. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time. Healing energy and positive thoughts continue to be sent to you and your family. Many hugs.
Love,
Terpsichore
If you are unable to view the video, please click here to view on YouTube.
Dear Katie,
I wish you strength in the moments you need it the most. In times I need it the most myself, I need music. So I searched and found for you something that has helped me, and hope it will help you.
Katie, I'm so very sorry that you're having to go through such a rough time in your life. I've added you and your family to my prayer list. Please don't forget to take good care of yourself as you care for others. Hugs and more hugs.......
Queenie
There is in every true woman's heart a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity; but which kindles up, and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity.
-- Washington Irving
We acquire the strength we have overcome.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A daughter is a miracle that never ceases to be miraculous...full of beauty and forever beautiful...loving and caring and truly amazing.
-- Deanna Beisser
Katie, I know the strain that caring and worrying for a sick parent can have on a person. I hope you are taking care of yourself and finding ways to regenerate your spirit.
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you know that you are surrounded by friends here in blogland, that will hold you up if you falter, hug you if you need one, and surround you with love.
Christina
Dear Katie,
You already know that i am keeping you , your mom, your family in my prayers. I walked the path you are now walking last year, it is not easy. You are an amazing daughter...among other roles. Remember to take care of yourself, too....and to accept any help that is offered.
hugs abby
Hi Katie,
I am so sorry for what happened to your mom and as you know I was glad because you were right there for her. You have had quite a lot going on lately, without a real break to care for yourself, Rob couldn’t be there with you all the time either, which doesn’t make the situation easier. But I’d wish for you to know something . I admire you endlessly for your strength and your positive way of looking at things, especially in rough times. I don’t know how to tell you how awesome this is. It is wonderful and I wish I had some more of that. And I want you to know that you are in my heart.
And…therefore I wish for you to have a moment to relax e.g. with a yummy cup of coffee, tea or some other nice little treat! (I had a photo here, but my email obviously hates coffee).
I hope you can create a little quality time for yourself now and then, this little moment where you relax and your thoughts wander away from any sorrow. And when Rob returns I wish for the two of you to have a sensational reconnection. Wishing your mom to heal well and sending positive thoughts and prayers.
love, hugs and a squeeze from Tilda and me
Nina
Follow That Snowplow
It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little blond got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car while it warmed up and thought about her situation.
She finally remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard she should wait for a snowplow to come by and follow it. That way she would not get stuck in a snowdrift. This made her feel much better and sure enough in a little while a snowplow went by and she started to follow it.
As she followed the snowplow, she was feeling very smug as they continued and she was not having any problem with the blizzard conditions. After quite some time had passed, she was somewhat surprised when the snowplow stopped and the driver got out and came back to her car and signaled for her to roll down her window. The snowplow driver wanted to know if she was all right as she had been following him for a long time. She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice to follow a snowplow when caught in a blizzard.
The driver replied that it was OK with him and she could continue if she wanted but he was done with the Wal-Mart parking lot and was going over to K-Mart next.
Katie, you are in my thoughts. Sending positive thoughts, prayers, strength and love to you all and sending best wishes for your Mom's recovery.
Love,
Roz
Katie,
On those days that feel too overwhelming to face, know your friends are there sending you our prayers and best wishes. We wish we could be there beside to hold your hand and give you a hug but since we can't, we'll hold you up from where ever we are!
Hugs to you,
Clara
Katie…please remember that we are here for you. If there is anything we can do to help, please reach out.
Thank you to all who contributed...if you have not contributed and would like to, it is never too late...go ahead and send it to me and I will be happy to add it to this post.
A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself. As he walks up to the bar the bartender asks, "what's the matter?"
The fellow replies, "well I've got these two horses (sniff,sniff), and well... I can't tell them apart. I don't know if I'm mixing up riding times or even feeding them the right foods."
The bartender, feeling sorry for the guy, tries to think of something he can do.
"Why don't you try shaving the tail of one of the horses?"
The man stops crying and says, "that sounds like a good idea, I think I'll try it."
A few months later he comes back to the bar in worse condition than he was before.
"What's the matter now?" the bartender asks.
The fellow, in no condition to be in public, answers, "I shaved the tail of one of the horses (sob, sob), but it grew back and I can't tell them apart again!"
The bartender, now just wanting him to shut up or leave says, "why don't you try shaving the mane, maybe that will not grow back."
The fellow stops crying, has a few drinks, and leaves. A few months later the fellow is back in the bar. The bartender has never seen anybody in this sorry of a state. Without the bartender even asking, the fellow breaks into his problems. "I... I shaved the (sob) mane of one of the (sniff) horses, and... it... it... grew back!"
The bartender, now furious at the guy's general stupidity, yells, "for crying out loud, just measure the stupid horses. Perhaps one is slightly taller that the other one!" The fellow can not believe what the bartender has said and storms out of the bar.
The next day the fellow comes running back into the bar as if he had just won the lottery.
"It worked, it worked!" he exclaims.
"I measured the horses and the black one is two inches taller than the white one!"
An American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following a day of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.
He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served?"
The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bulls testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!"
The American, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the hell, I'm on vacation! Bring me an order!"
The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy!
The next morning, the American returned, placed his order, and then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy of the day.
After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday!"
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si senor. Sometimes the bull wins."
Procrastinators Reminder: Please send your contributions for Katie’s post to me at catsbrighteyes at gmail dot com no later than tomorrow FEBRUARY 23rd, 2015.
In a small town, an elderly couple had been dating each other for a long time.
At the urging of their friends, they decided it was finally time for marriage.
Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work.
They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.
Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.
"How do you feel about sex? He asked, rather trustingly.
"Well," she said, responding very carefully, "I'd have to say...I would like it infrequently."
The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, then over his glasses, he looked her in the eyes and casually asked: "Is that one word or two?"
Reminder: Please send your contributions for Katie’s post to me at catsbrighteyes at gmail dot com no later than FEBRUARY 23rd, 2015.
Hey everyone…you might have read and/or heard that our Katie over at This Whole Thing is going through a very rough time with her parents…especially her mother and has asked for prayers.
Although Rob is as supportive and wonderful as always, due to circumstances beyond their control, he is unable to be with her in person. This makes things a bit harder on her so our Meredith suggested we might put something together similar to what we did for Queenie to give her a bit of extra support.
So I am asking all y’all to send something…whatever you think will help…it can be a prayer, a picture, a YouTube video, a song, a poem, a cartoon or something entirely different that I haven’t suggested. If you would prefer your contribution to remain anonymous, please let me know when you send the email. Please send whatever you choose to me at catsbrighteyes at gmail dot com by FEBRUARY 23rd, 2015. Sorry, no, I am not giving you as much time because I really want to get our messages posted for Katie and next week promises to be crazy at work so as soon as people start sending, I can start compiling into one special post for Katie.
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV, it's a microwave!"
A bigshot business man had to spend a couple of days in the hospital.
He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his employees. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him.
The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him. She walked into his room and announced, “I have to take your temperature.”
After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth.
“No, I’m sorry, the nurse stated, “but for this reading, I can’t use an oral thermometer.”
This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his behind.
After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce, “I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!”
She leaves the door to his room open on her way out. He curses under his breath as he hears people walking past his door, laughing.
After almost an hour, the man’s doctor comes into the room.
“What’s going on here?” asked the doctor.
Angrily, the man answers, “What’s the matter, Doc? Haven’t you ever seen someone having their temperature taken before?”
After a pause, the doctor replies, “Yes, but never with a daffodil!”
Hey Queenie…many people wanted to let you know that they were thinking of you and sending lots of prayers and good wishes to you. Rather than clog up your inbox, we decided to put all of the messages and giggles into one post so that you can bookmark it and come read at your leisure. Hope you enjoy.
Sending prayers, healing energy and positive thoughts your way. Cat
When I tapped into my intuition about what to send you, Queenie, I saw a rose. (I'm not sending it because it's in my name!). Rose is an ancient and powerful symbol of healing. It has been used in both Eastern and Western cultures to cure all kinds of illness.
When I miscarried I went to see an energy worker to heal and as she worked on me, I saw a blooming rose in my uterus. When I told her, she said almost every woman chooses the rose as a symbol of healing their reproductive organs.
I would love to send you some rosewater to spray when you are exhausted or just needing to feel nourished. If there's an appropriate way to give me an address, or--they have it on Amazon, I could send you a gift card and the link?
I am supporting you through prayers, light and energy. You are a courageous, beautiful person. These journeys transform and shape us, deepening the way we live and relate in this world. I know you are already transforming at a rapid rate and I support your journey through darkness to light.
These sayings are always on my desktop as reminders to keep my chin up, nothing lasts forever and tomorrow is a new day. We all hope things are going better and we send prayers your way. Thoughts and prayers your way, Meredith
Queenie, You have been in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you know how important you are to all of us. I know you are are struggling right now, I hope you find peace.... Here is a poem, that i hope helps...
Never Give Up
I know that life is getting you down
And you want to smile, but only frown.
Look up, not down, for God is there,
He's ready to listen and answer your prayer.
The time and place are His to decide
You must believe in all you confide.
The pain will come and the tears will flow,
But never give up and you will know.....
God loves you more than words can say
He loves your hear and soul each day.
He'll never leave, He's your best friend
His arms will protect you til the end.
Miracles happen every day.....know that you are loved...
Hi Queenie, I am very sorry about you having to fight cancer. There have been some in my family and among close friends who had and have to fight as well and I wanted you to know that I wish the very best for you. I am absolutely sure that you have your loved ones around you to comfort you and give strength and many more are sending prayers and positive thoughts your way.
I only want you to be well again and I have no great wisdom to share but have been taught one thing that kept me going in difficult times: -> Don’t give up! Wishing you so much to be healed from this horrible illness. You are in my thoughts, hugs Nina
Dear Queenie, I hope this post makes you smile. Even though we don't know each other in person, we'll walk beside you on this path with your health. We'll be behind you to catch you if you falter. Our voices will be added to pray for you, and with you, when you need it. I hope you can see that you are loved and are held close in our hearts and minds.
I make handmade cards, and although I didn't make this one, I've kept it for a few years, until the right person came along to share it with.
If you can't see the poem in the picture, it is as follows,
Hello my friend. Just wanted to let you know you're in my prayers every day! I know you're busy fighting this illness and you need to reserve all of your fight for that purpose. While you're busy doing that, know that there are so many of us sending you prayers and strength.
Missing you and looking forward to catching up when you're up to it.
Take good care of yourself! Love and hugs to you, Clara
Your Majesty, I do not know you and vice versa. But I have read about the ordeal you are going through and have to face. And it may sound silly, but I wish you well.
I wish you will be strong to face your friends and family and show them they can still talk to you, because you are not your illness.
I wish that people will not avoid you because they don't know what to say to you, because you are not your illness.
I wish that you will find the strength to get dressed on a day you'd rather stayed in bed, for the illness is not you.
I wish you are kind to the people who love you, even when the pain makes you angry and desperate, for they cannot feel the pain of your illness.
I wish that you will be strong and fearless for the moment that will come for us all, for it will help all that will join you a bit later so much.
This is for Queenie. She doesn't know me, so there is no need to say who this is from. I don't know if she is Christian, but I found this on YouTube and thought she might like it. She should start watching at about a minute and 40 seconds in.
If you can’t get the video to work, click here to view it on YouTube.
Aaaaaaand here's one that isn't Christian related.
If you can’t get the video to work, click here to view it on YouTube.
Dear Queenie, You have a special place in my heart. Back when I was the new girl on the block, I remember that you and I were both the 'non-bloggers' in Wilma's Subs in the City group. And even though I now know the truth behind that, I still feel a special kinship with you - and I probably always will. :)
What you are going through now is extremely hard. I myself have not been through it - but I've had friends who have. What's most important I think is not feeling totally alone. And Queenie, you are not alone.
For my friends and family who've gone through battling cancer (or any difficult medical issue) - the only thing that really gives them (and me) strength is their faith in God. Having a Bible and reading God's word is so powerful and comforting. Being able to pray and to put your trust in Him is like nothing else. I pray that you will be able to turn to Him, and find that comfort and strength that only He can give. And that you also have lots of love from your friends and family to envelope you as you fight this battle.
Here are a few verses that are highlighted in my Bible - they are especially precious to me. Jeremiah 29:11-13 'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. Proverbs 3:4,5 Trust in the Lord, with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths. Psalm 27: 13, 14 I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord. Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Isaiah 40: 28 - 31 The everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength to the weary, And to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly, yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary. Psalm 54:4 Behold, God is my helper; The Lord is the sustainer of my soul Matthew 11:28, 29 Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Philippians 4:6,7 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
I mean nothing offensive Queenie - and I am certainly not being 'preachy' here. It was really the only thing of value that I could send you from my heart.
I would love to hear from you if ever you are able - but I totally understand if not. I send you my best, and I will be praying for you and looking for updates on Cat's blog.
Queenie…please remember your are part of our family. If there is anything we can do to help, please reach out.
Thank you to all who contributed...if you have not contributed and would like to, it is not too late...go ahead and send it to me and I will be happy to add it to this post.
Thank you to everyone who has submitted a contribution for Queenie. I am compiling everything into one post for her and hope to have it done in the next day or two. (If ya still want to send something, late contributions will be accepted. )
------------------------------------------------------- Received the following in an email…hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!!
They put in a correction the next day.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No, do you really think so? ------------------------------------------------------- Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far! ----------------------------------------------------------- Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy! --------------------------------------------------------------- Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's! ------------------------------------------------------ Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial! ---------------------------------------------------------- War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect! ---------------------------------------------------------------- If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought! ---------------------------------------------------------------- Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain;PoliceSuspect Homicide
They may be on to something! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? ---------------------------------------------------------- Man Struck By Lightning:Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge! ---------------------------------------------- New Study of Obesity Looks for LargerTest Group
Weren't they fat enough?! ----------------------------------------------- Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans! ---------------- --------------------------------- Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken? **************************************** Local High SchoolDropoutsCut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again! *************************************************** Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall! ******************************************* And the winner is...
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right? ***************************************************
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!