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Saturday, November 14, 2015

Tales of Dog Food

I have two dogs and I was buying a large bag of Purina at Costco and standing in line at the checkout.
 
A man behind me asked if I had a dog.
 
On impulse, I told him that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.
 
I told him that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
 
 
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a woman who was behind him.
 
 
Horrified, he asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told him no; I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me.
 
 
I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.


12 comments:

  1. Cat???? This was a joke you found...Right? You didn't actually say this?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Minelle...it is a joke that was sent to me by a friend who said "Cat, I can see you pulling this!" And she was right...I would. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  2. Hi Cat love that joke, thanks for sharing.
    Hugs Lindy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it Lindy. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. LoL, funny, but it is a joke, not your own story, is it? :) Anyways, thank you for the giggle, Cat.

    hugs

    Nina

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    Replies
    1. Yes Nina...it is a joke for now but I would pull something like this. Happy you enjoyed it. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. Thank you Abby...happy you think so. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. (Omg I hope this is a joke!!!
    love Jan,xx

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    Replies
    1. LOL Jan...it is a joke but I would say something like this if I was asked a dumb question like that. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  6. Oh, ha, ha. Loved it. Might give this a try next time I am buying food for the monsters.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it Don. If you're buying dog food and someone asks if you have a dog...they deserve a smart a$$ answer. :-D

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

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