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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Pay the Lady…

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really?  Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them.  Thanks for telling me officer.”

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop.  “Where did you get all that money?  You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady.

"You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course.  A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden!  It used to really tick me off.  Kills the flowers, you know. 

Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?

So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers.

Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20, or I cut it off.' “

"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK.  Good luck!  Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

The old lady said  "Well, Not everybody pays…”



ROFLMBO

32 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness Cat. Now you just have to wonder where that little old lady was going with her two bags.

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    1. Interesting question Dana. Bank and graveyard? LOL

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  2. Oh for the love of Pete! I never saw that coming, lol :-P

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  3. Wow... That's one way to make a living. Bucko says Ew! Thanks for the laugh.

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    1. Sure is creative TL. Tell Bucko not to pee in any knot holes in fences and he doesn't have to worry. LOL

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  4. Ohhhhh gross! My stomach is turning LOL

    Callie

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  5. Lol Cat and Ew ... yuck! I wonder what the proportion of payers to non-payers is?

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. Hmmm Roz - don't know but you'd think that most men would find $20 a bargain to keep that particular body part. LOL

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  6. ROFL.... so funny!
    Nothing quite like a penis in jeopardy joke....
    hugs
    lillie

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    1. Like that did ya Lillie. ;) And is Ian laughing at it? LOL

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  7. OMG, hysterical. Instead of a chip shot it was a clip shot.

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  8. Lol! Thanks Cat! I love these jokes you leave for us ;) They just brighten up the day!

    P

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    1. Happy you enjoyed it P. Have a very bright day! ;)

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  9. ROFLMBO!!! Where do you find these?!
    Thanks Cat!

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    1. You're welcome BB. Friends who tell me I have a 'warped' sense of humor keep sending me jokes like this. ;)

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  10. Cat this is not a very funny way to start of a day. Do you know how much that hurts? Shame on you! Where can I deposit my $ 20, I like to pay in advance, just to be sure.
    I see a lot of laughing ladies here. Very worrisome.

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    1. ROFL Bas. Haven't got a clue how much that hurts but I can imagine. Keep your $20 and just don't go peeing in any fence knot holes! ;) We ladies do like to laugh don't we.

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  11. Cat your jokes are the very best! Thank you for making me laugh like a drain!

    Hugs, Ami

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    1. Thank you Ami, so happy you enjoyed it. ;)

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  12. Oh no! Well, that's a unique home business! LOL

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  13. Omg, omg, omg!!! I didn't see that coming at all. I have that image in my head. Bloody male parts!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    1. ROFL Minelle. Won't be bloody parts if they pay! ;)

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  14. BAHAHAHAHA!!! Cute story! :D

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    1. Welcome back JJ - happy you enjoyed it. ;)

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  15. That was funny. Thanks for the laugh.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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    1. Happy you enjoyed it Ronnie. ;)

      Blessings,
      Cat

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