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Friday, October 2, 2015

The Ocean

When children was ask to write about the ocean this is what they wrote.
 
1. This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6 )

2. Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)

3. If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don't have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (Mike, age 7)

4. Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)

5. A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy, age 8)

6. My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)

7. When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off eating beans. (William, age 7)

8. Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)

9. I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)

10. Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves in to chargers. (Christopher, age 7)

11. When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. ( Kevin , age 6)

12. Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. ( Becky , age 8)

13. On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired right up her big fat ass. (Julie, age 7)

14. The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)

15. My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom. (James, age 7)

16 comments:

  1. Gosh, Cat, I love this post! There are parts of teaching that I do not miss at all. I love my job right now. But there are the times when you got to peek into a child's perception of the world and felt you were the luckiest person in the world.

    I think I loved the electric eels the best.

    Hugs,
    Ella

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    Replies
    1. We used to have a TV show called "Children say the darndest things"...absolutely love hearing what comes out of kids mouths.

      I now have a picture in my head of many caves in the ocean floor with electric outlets lining the walls. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  2. LoL Cat, love them all! Out of the mouths of babes :) Thank you for the giggle. Hope you have a wonderful weekend :)

    Hugs
    Roz

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    Replies
    1. You're welcome Roz...happy you enjoyed this. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  3. Thanks Cat that was great. Kids come out with some funny things. Felt sorry for the little girl in number 9 though that didn't want to talk about the ocean.

    Have a good weekend.
    Lindy x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome Lindy. Kids do say some of the funniest things...oh yes, I did feel sorry for the little girl in #9...felt sorry for her parents also.

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  4. Poor Emily Richardson!

    Loved these!

    Hugs
    Ami

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    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them Ami...yup...poor Emily. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. Number 13 had me laughing so hard. Now I can't get that picture out of my head!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is a good one isn't it Minelle...still got that picture in your head? ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  6. These are so funny, I was laughing so hard. Kids are something, aren't they? Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. You're welcome Sunny. Happy to give you such a good laugh. Wish we had the the "Kids say the darndest things' tv show again. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  7. Hi Cat, these are too funny. Makes me think twice how to behave and what to say in front of my little girl. :) Poor Emily and poor sailor in #15. Thank you for the laugh. Wishing you a wonderful weekend.

    hugs

    Nina

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    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them Nina. Oh yes...definitely need to think at least twice before you say something in front of your little girl...and the new baby coming! Hope you're doing well.

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

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  8. I love kids. Their little minds come up with some great things!
    #9 is so sad. I just want to hug that kid.

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    Replies
    1. Kids do come up with some amazing things don't they Sarah. I totally agree with you regarding #9...just really want to give that kid a few squeezes.

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

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