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Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Australia Computer Terminology

Another joke from our darlin’ Ami over at Ami's Starsong

Hope you enjoy.
 
Australia Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!!
 
LOGON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter.
 
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie.
 
MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.
 
DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the ute.
 
HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies.
 
KEYBOARD: Where you hang the ute keys.
 
WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold.
 
SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season.
 
BYTE: What mozzies do.
 
MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do.
 
CHIP: A pub snack.
 
MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips.
 
MODEM: What you did to the lawns.
 
LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.
 
SOFTWARE: Plastic knives and forks you get at Red Rooster.

HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives and forks - from K-Mart.

MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.

MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up.

WEB: What spiders make.

WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah.

SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the ute won't go.

CURSOR: What you say when the ute won't go.

YAHOO: What you say when the ute does go.

UPGRADE: A steep hill.

SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.

NETWORK:What you do when you need to repair the fishing net.

INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go.

NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover a hole in the net.

ONLINE: Where you hang the washing.

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.


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Some of these sound like a few of our redneck jokes. LOL

20 comments:

  1. I guess I'm not very fluent in Australian-ese. What the heck is a ute??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Autumn...now you're more fluent. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
    2. Thanks for answering the question Callie. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  2. LOL Cat these are funny and I agree with you, some of them are very similar to our redneck jokes. Thanks, Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome Lisa and very right...some are similar to our redneck jokes. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  3. Oh yes these jokes may indeed be universal!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So true Minelle. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them River. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  5. My favourite is the Laptop. The morning began with a smile,

    Han

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is a good one isn't it Han...my cat is sleeping in my lap right now. ;) Happy you had a nice start to the morning.

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  6. LoL Cat, love it! Yep, sounds like our Aussie neighbours ;) Thanks Ami and Cat :)

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Enjoy poking fun at your Aussie neighbors do ya Roz? ;) Happy you enjoyed these.

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  7. Thanks Ami and Cat. I wondered what an ute was.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome Ronnie...happy Callie answered your question. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. Ya sometimes have to wonder don't ya Sunny. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  9. I am SO glad you liked these, Cat. I am still laughing. My Aussie friend sends me some beauts! I'll continue to pass them along! Just feel free.

    Yeah - a ute stands for utility vehicle.

    Hugs
    Ami

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing Ami...I laugh every time I read these. Keep 'em coming! ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete

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