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Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Lovemaking Tips for Seniors

1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle....

3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Make sure you put 111 (911 in the US) on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.

6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have oxygen ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want- the neighbours are all deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

Courtesy of  Dawn French Fan Club

12 comments:

  1. Not sure if I like this.... Hmmmmmm. Lol
    It will not be me when I reach that age! Lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Minelle...and why won't it be you? *snicker*

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  2. I am not old...but older...and the only one i agree with is #8....if you are lucky, no kids in the house either.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Abby...you are not old enough to have to worry about any of these...don't think anyone in blogland is. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  3. Cat,
    How about putting a post it note on your lover's forehead. Write his her name.
    Meredith

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Mere...good one! ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  4. Thanks for the laughs, Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them Lisa. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  5. ROFLMAO. Nope, not gonna be me lol

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Roz...okay, if you say so. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  6. LOLOL Cat T! I'm with Roz. Not me, not ever, nope! :) Many hugs,

    <3 Katie T

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ROFL Katie T...I'll take your word for it. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete

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