Marriage

The tradition at weddings

A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?"

His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's happy and this is the happiest day of her life."

The boy thinks about this, and then says, "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"

An organization that makes men fear marriage

The British had an organization that Americans are now considering adopting.

It seems that in England, they had a men's club, Bachelors' Anonymous.  It was highly successful in making men fear or even hate marriage.

The club provided a unique way to treat the problem of bachelors wanting to marry.  They send over a mother-in-law in nightgown, hair curlers, and a mud pack.

Like Father, Like Husband?

If it's true that girls are inclined to marry men like their fathers, it is understandable why so many mothers cry so much at weddings.

 

A sudden change of mind

My Dearest Susan,

Sweetie of my heart.  I've been so desolate ever since I broke off our engagement.  Simply devastated.  Won't you please consider coming back to me?  You hold a place in my heart no other woman can fill.  I can never marry another woman quite like you.  I need you so much.  Won't you forgive me and let us make a new beginning?  I love you so.

Yours always and truly,

John

P.S. Congratulations on you winning the state lottery.  

Kids at the Wedding

At a friend's wedding, everything went smoothly until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle.

The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests.  When asked afterward why he behaved so badly, he explained, "I was just trying to be a good ring bear."

A man is almost about to die

As he lay on his deathbed, the man confided to his wife, "I cannot die without telling you the truth.  I cheated on you throughout our whole marriage.  All those nights when I told you I was working late, I was with other women.  And not just one woman either, but I've slept with dozens of them."

His wife looked at him calmly and said, "Why do you think I gave you the poison?"

May I borrow your dog for a few days?

It's for my mother-in-law," explained the mourner at the funeral procession.  Tightening the leash, he gestured down at the dog and said, "My Doberman here killed her."

"Gee...That's terrible," commiserated the spectator.  "But... Hmmmm... Is there anyway you might lend me your dog for a day or so?"

The bereaved son-in-law pointed his thumb over his shoulder and answered, "Get in line."

I have "great" news for you

The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, "I have great news for you.  Pretty soon, we're going to be three in this house instead of two."

Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes.

He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, "I'm glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us."

courtesy of  ilyke.net