Adult Content Warning

You have entered a site intended for ADULTS ONLY. If you are under the age of 18, or if it is illegal to view such material in your community, please exit this site immediately. This site contains mature content including but not limited to; articles, discussions, pictures and other materials that some people may find offensive. If such materials offend you, please exit this site immediately.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

The Salesman

A young guy from North Dakota moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?"

The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in North Dakota."

Well, the boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he'd give him a shot, so he gave him the job.

"You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."


His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales floor.

"How many customers bought something from you today?"

The kid frowns and looks at the floor and mutters, "One".

The boss says "Just one?!?!  Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day.  That will have to change, and soon, if you'd like to continue your employment here.  We have very strict standards for our sales force here in Florida.  One sale a day might have been acceptable in North Dakota, but you're not on the farm anymore, son."


The kid took his beating, but continued to look at his shoes, so the boss felt kinda bad for chewing him out on his first day.

He asked (semi-sarcastically), "So, how much was your one sale for?"

The kid looks up at his boss and says "$101,237.65".

The boss, astonished, says $101,237.65?!?  What the heck did you sell?"

The kid says, "Well, first, I sold him some new fish hooks.  Then I sold him a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks.  Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft.  Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition."

The boss said "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a TRUCK!?"


The kid said "No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife, and I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot, you should go fishing.'"

18 comments:

  1. ROFL This was a good one Cat! Thanks for sharing it, Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it Julie. ;)

      Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  2. That was good! It gave me quite the chuckle!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Always happy to give you a chuckle Minelle. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  3. LoL Cat, yep, sounds like a vacuum salesman!

    Hugs,
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Roz...will have to take your word for it...can't remember ever running in to a vacuum salesman. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  4. LOL,,,,,did not see it coming and started my day with a good laugh...thanks.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gotcha Abby! A laugh is definitely a good way to start the day. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  5. I didn't see that end! what a salesman.
    love Jan.xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gotcha Jan!!! Excellent salesman! ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  6. Now that is a salesman! :) Somehow your blog fell off my list! I put you back on again. Grrr blogger is annoying!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He is one heck of a salesman Sara! Blogger hates me...I have had blogs fall off my reading list or stay on my reading list but don't show updates! I cuss blogger regularly but...it is free. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
    2. Yep I know, have to appreciate that it is free, and curse it quietly under my breath so I don't get spanked for cursing! lol

      Delete
    3. LOL Sara...use some of my curse words...son of a biscuit eater”, '”motor trucking firetrucker”, “son of a bunny rabbit”, and “egg sucking dawg”. You could also run them together and call someone a "moronic motor trucking son of a biscuit eater!"

      Problem solved! :D

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  7. Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it Cygnet. ;)

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete
  8. This guy's weekend really is shot, but not because his wife needs tampons - the salesman sold him everything else but those. Dog house! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ROFLMBO Irishey...even if he bought the tampons, think he's still in the Dog house for buying all the guy toys! :D

      Hugs and Blessings...
      Cat

      Delete

Thanks for stopping by. Respectful comments are always welcome.