Adult Content Warning

You have entered a site intended for ADULTS ONLY. If you are under the age of 18, or if it is illegal to view such material in your community, please exit this site immediately. This site contains mature content including but not limited to; articles, discussions, pictures and other materials that some people may find offensive. If such materials offend you, please exit this site immediately.

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Immutable Laws

Courtesy of Meredith's Jack…and all SO TRUE! Open-mouthed smile 
 
1. Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
 
2. Law of Gravity
Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.
 
3. Law of Probability 
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
 
4. Law of Random Numbers
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.
 
5. Variation Law 
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
 
6. Law of the Bath 
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
 
7. Law of Close Encounters
The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
 
8. Law of the Result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!
 
9. Law of Biomechanics
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
 
10. Law of the Theaters & Sports Arenas
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last.. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.
 
11. The Coffee Law
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
 
12. Murphy's Law of Lockers
If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
 

13. Law of Physical Surfaces
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
 
14. Law of Logical Argument
Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.
 
15. Law of Physical Appearance
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
 
16. Law of Public Speaking
A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!
 
17. Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!
 
18. Doctors' Law
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better.  But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
 
19.  Law of Parking
No matter how far away you park your car from your destination, and away from other cars and in an open parking lot, you will find a large 150 ton pickup truck parked next to you when you return.

16 comments:

  1. Loved reading this thank you Cat and Jack.

    Hugs Lindy xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Lindy...happy you enjoyed them. :)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  2. LoL Jack and Cat, these are great, and so true! Thank you for the giggle :)

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Roz...happy you agree. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. Hi Cat, these are all so true!
    love Jan, xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They sure are, Jan! ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. Jack and Cat, Thanks for the smile. Yes all true.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Ronnie...they really are, aren't they! ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. Unfortunately, all so very true.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely agree, Sunny. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  6. Yes, all so true. The last one happens to me all the time.
    Rosie xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Rosie...that's frustrating and just pure D sucks, doesn't it!

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  7. All true! The last one is a nightmare waiting to happen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, Minelle...frustrating when I have to climb in from the other side of the vehicle. grrrr

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  8. Love these and believe them all to be true, too!
    ----Baker

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed then, Baker...I can swear to it...they are all true. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

Thanks for stopping by. Respectful comments are always welcome.