Adult Content Warning

You have entered a site intended for ADULTS ONLY. If you are under the age of 18, or if it is illegal to view such material in your community, please exit this site immediately. This site contains mature content including but not limited to; articles, discussions, pictures and other materials that some people may find offensive. If such materials offend you, please exit this site immediately.

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Zen Phrases for Enlightenment and Laughter

Have shared some of these before but some are new…enjoy!   Winking smile  
 
image

 

Not every wisdom has to be some profound train of thought that evokes a deep emotion or understanding toward something.  A notion that is illustrated perfectly by these 22 zen phrases, each of which captures the lighthearted, humorous side of a life that gets dark sometimes.
 
  1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
  2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
  3. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
  4. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
  5. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
  6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
  7. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
  8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
  9. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
  10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
  11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
  12. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
  13. Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.
  14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
  15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
  16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
  17. Duct tape is like “The Force.” It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
  18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
  19. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
  20. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
  21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
  22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.



22 comments:

  1. These are great Cat, very wise words lol. Thanks for sharing :)

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Roz...happy you enjoyed them. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  2. Cat,
    These are wise words indeed.
    Meredith

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you think so, Mere. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. Yes wise words indeed Cat. Thank you.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Ronnie. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. All words to live by.....sometimes easier said than done.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So agree, Abby...much easier said than done. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. I loved these, Cat,
    I really loved number 9. Sound advice, I'd say.
    --Baker

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed them, Baker...definitely agree with #9...very sound advice. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  6. Cat, these are great, and I have never seen them before. The guy in the boat drinking beer would be a woman named Ella. One of my favorite things to do.

    Hugs From Ella

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Ella...happy to share something new. Never really enjoyed fishing but would take my books and a cooler to join my ex and kiddos for a day of fishing. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  7. Zen phrases - such good advice. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are aren't they, Sunny. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  8. Thanks for sharing these wise words, Cat.
    Rosie xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're very welcome, Rosie. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  9. LOL I'd heard some of these, but not others! Thanks for the laugh, Cat! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed the, Lilli. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Those are good ones, Minelle...happy you enjoyed them. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  11. Hi Cuz! :) I have never read these before. They are very good, and fun to think about. #8 & #22 made me LOL! I really liked #19. How very true! Thanks for sharing these! Many hugs,

    <3 Katie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy to share something new with you, Cuz! I think #22 cracked everyone up because it is so true! LOL Matthew was constantly using versions of #19 while playing bongos on my butt! ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

Thanks for stopping by. Respectful comments are always welcome.