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Friday, April 15, 2016

Why Yard Sales are Important

Meredith’s Jack over at New Twist, After All These Years is getting quite prolific and this is one of his best! Winking smile  Hope you enjoy!

Sound advice for everybody…
 
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.

This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
 
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.
 
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen of it.
 
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
 
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China?
A. Shut up.
 
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, Taiwan or China.
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala.
* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
 
Instead, keep the money in America by:
1) Spending it at yard sales, or
2) Going to ball games, or
3) Spending it on prostitutes, or
4) Beer or
5) Tattoos.
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)
 
Conclusion:
Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day!

No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

Open-mouthed smile 

10 comments:

  1. Cat,
    Your friend Jack has been waiting for this post. He feels famous by way of your blog.
    Meredith

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Mere...you two crack me up! Please keep those giggles coming! ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  2. Oh, I am lmao. Thank you Cat and Jack

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Sunny...happy you enjoyed it. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. Hi Cat, It's just like England!!
    love Jan, xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Jan...why am I not surprised. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. Sam will love this one! Sad thing is that it is all so true. Thanks to you and Jack.

    Hugs From Ella

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome, Ella...happy to share something Sam will enjoy also. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. So you get actual rebates by cheque to stimulate the economy? We just got quantative easing on this side of the pond. The result was just the same though, the money went everywhere but at home.
    Thanks Cat and Jack.
    Rosie xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Rosie...there was some stimulus money a while back but I sure don't remember receiving any of it. You're right...the money does go everywhere but at home doesn't it. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

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