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Friday, July 22, 2016

Still a Virgin

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.


On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
 
"What?" said the puzzled groom.


"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

 
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
 
Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
 
Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
 
Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
 
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
 
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
 
Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
 
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
 
Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
 
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was lick it...God! I miss him!

But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

 
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
 
 
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

10 comments:

  1. LoL Cat, think she may have got it right this time lol

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well...he is a lawyer, Roz so I'd say she has a good chance. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  2. Hi Cat, at last!!! lol.
    Hope everything is okay with you
    love Jan, xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She can only hope, Jan! I'm hanging in there. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  3. I just knew there would be a punchline like that!

    Hugs
    Ami

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Ami...didn't catch you out on this one, eh? ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  4. Very fun giggle to read this morning, Cuz! :) Sheesh! I think that she likes variety! LOL!

    Hope that you are doing well, and that things are looking up for your mom. Thinking of you! Many hugs,

    <3 Katie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it, Cuz...not sure if she likes variety or just really wants to end that virginity! ;)

      Mom is one day at a time but am hopeful.

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete
  5. Very funny. Hope her dreams comes true. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy you enjoyed it, Sunny...think she has a good shot at it by picking a lawyer. ;)

      Hugs and blessings...Cat

      Delete

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