10 Things To Avoid That Trigger Anxiety

Did you know that anxiety disorder is the most common mental illness in the United States? It affects 40 million adults over the age of 18 (roughly 18% of the population). Anxiety alone costs more than $42 billion a year in mental health bills.
 
So what triggers this disorder? How can we overcome it? What can we do to help ourselves feel better? These answers, along with natural ways to regain your health from anxiety are included in this list to provide solutions, as well as awareness…

 

HERE ARE 10 THINGS THAT CAN TRIGGER ANXIETY 

(AND HOW TO AVOID THEM):

1. OVER THINKING
When we over think we create emotional problems. We make up scenarios that aren’t even there. Over thinking creates fear into the future. When we stress over things we alter our emotional stability. Usually this happens in the middle of the night when we cannot sleep.
This is a good time to try and meditate. Take deep breaths and relax your body. Focus on something joyful.

2. FINANCES
Nothing causes more stress and anxiety than worrying about money. Unfortunately, in the middle of worrying about money some people go spend more. The fear of not having enough is constant in our lives. Many times we avoid dealing with the finances which make the issue even worse. Also, an increase in financial obligations causes a tremendous amount of anxiety.

Get help with your finances. Talk to your partner. Make a budget. The worst thing you can do is avoid the issue or ignore it. Also, over analyzing isn’t going to help the situation.

3. UNCERTAINTY
Fear of the unknown is a huge trigger for anxiety. Trying to make decisions without foreseeing the outcome lets us feel helpless. This is magnified by social media and the news. People fear attacks, catastrophic events, and death which are overplayed on television. We are constantly bombarded by negative input from the external world.

Turn off the news. Detach from what’s happening out there and just focus on your life. The world has always had bad things happen but we cannot live based on unknown fears of the future. Yoga, hiking, swimming, and other activities can help us refocus on what’s important in our lives.

4. CONFRONTATIONS
Fear of confronting someone about how you feel is huge. Some of us do not take criticism and prejudice lightly. Confrontations can be a trigger to anxiety disorder. Avoiding the person increases the fear even more.

Write a letter to the person. Send a text. You do not have to live in fear of another person’s attitude. That’s all on them. You don’t have to own their issues. Setting boundaries is never easy but in the long run it helps you deal with the person in a healthy manner.

5. WORK
Being unhappy with your work can cause anxiety and depression. If you’ve lost your job that can bring about tremendous fears. Work is an important part of our adult life. We must work in order to sustain our lifestyle. When we are stressed at work we begin to allow it to bleed into other aspects of our lives. Relationships get affected. Our health is compromise.

It’s easy to tell someone to find another job. But, it’s not always easy finding another job. Minimizing your anxiety about work requires that you be honest with what you are doing. Do you like what you do? What could you be doing? Follow your heart. Talk to a therapist or a job counselor. Find out what matches your aptitude. We spend more time at work than at home, so make that a priority.

6. LOSING CONTROL
Fear arrives when we feel we have lost control. The reality is that we have little control in anything in our lives. We don’t know when we will die. We don’t know how we will survive. We only know this very moment. Anxiety disorder feeds on all our fears. Any phobias become magnified and we cannot let them go. Control is one of those triggers that is irrational but cannot be ignored when you suffer from anxiety. In fearing that if you can’t manage the control of future events something worst will happen is paralyzing.

It’s important to accept that control is not real. Medication for anxiety disorder helps with the obsession of control. Exercise also helps. Being in nature and getting out of your own way also helps puts things in perspective.

7. AGING
The fear of getting old is constant. You cannot stop aging. The moment you are born you begin the aging process. But, there are people who have anxiety with this fact of life. They will do everything possible not to get old, from surgeries to transforming their lives. They will date people younger than them to feel young. They will buy creams and inject Botox to look younger. The reality is that it’s unavoidable. Aging is non stoppable.

You can continue to eat healthy and take care of your body. The minute you release the fears on getting older you are free. It’s paralyzing to pretend that aging isn’t happening.



8. MEETING NEW PEOPLE
We aren’t alone on this journey. We see people every day, at a supermarket, in the streets, or at work. It’s very difficult to hide from what’s fully present in our world. Meeting new people triggers anxiety in many people. They have no problem moving through life with little interaction. But, we learn from each other. Usually the anxiety arrives when you know you have to meet the person, but once you move past the initial moment it’s okay.

Remember that once you meet a new person you are enriched by what they teach you. Do some visualization exercises before meeting anyone. Send light to that person and become aware that they are here to teach you something, sometimes in the smallest of ways.

9. RELATIONSHIPS
Relationships can be difficult especially if you are in the wrong one. Anxiety and fear take over. It’s hard to let go when you are worrying about that other person. Love isn’t difficult. If you are feeling constant anxiety with that person please be aware that your own intuition is guiding you. Perhaps this person is not for you.

Honor your feelings. Make a plan and get help. If you are in an abusive relationship please remember that there are many venues to find assistance. You do not have to endure this alone.

10. ILLNESSES
The unknown of illnesses is enough to push anyone over the edge. Anxiety becomes the monster that walks along side you through these times. Whether you are ill, or someone near you, it is still stricken by the uncertainty of the future. Illnesses are challenging and truly debilitating. Dr. Elisabeth Kubler, a Swiss psychiatrist, first implemented the Five Stages of Grief in 1969 which explained emotions that most people experienced during grief. There is no real order to them: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. When we are ill we truly forget what it was not to be sick.

Life challenging situations require assistance from others. Meditation or any preferred form of prayer are healthy ways of centering your spirit, but ultimately these are times that require others to help. Vulnerability is courageous. There is nothing to be ashamed of.

In one form or another, anxiety is part of life. We worry, we stress, and we get depressed. We are humans. What needs to be addressed is how to reduce those things that trigger the worst of fears in us. Life is fragile and you should not have to do it alone.

Courtesy of Power of Positivity

Quick GIgggle

Here’s a short but very funny giggle from Meredith's Jack,…

I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing.
 
He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel under a constrained environment.​"​
 
I was very impressed.
 
Upon further questioning, I learned that he was washing dishes with hot water under his wife's supervision.

At the Pharmacy

Outside a pharmacy in a busy street, a poor man is clutching onto a pole for dear life, not breathing, not moving, not twitching a muscle, just standing there, frozen.



The pharmacist goes up to his assistant and asks: "What's the matter with that guy? Wasn't he in here earlier?"

Assistant replies: "Yes he was. He had the most terrible cough and none of my prescriptions seemed to help."

Pharmacist says: "He seems to be fine now."

Assistant replies: "Sure, he does. I gave him a box of the strongest laxatives on the market. Now he won't dare cough!"
 

---

There was the woman who approached the local pharmacist and asked for cyanide.



"What on earth would you want to do with cyanide?" he asked.

"I want to poison my husband" she said coolly.

Of course the pharmacist was quite upset about this and made it quite clear to her that he was not going to be part of such a plot, and that he had no intention of selling any poison to her for that purpose.

The woman then took a photograph out of her bag. It showed the pharmacist's wife in bed with the woman's husband.

“Oh! You didn’t tell me you had a prescription!”
 

---

A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell bottom deodorant, and never have.



Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more.

"I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."

"But I always get it here," says the blonde.
"Do you have the container it comes in?"

"Yes!" said the blonde, "I will go get it.

"She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."

The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container, "To apply, push up bottom."

Courtesy of BabaMail

Meet in the Park

I’m not the best looking guy; some would say I’m a little frayed around the edges these days.

But, I have a nice bike, a little money, and I spend most of my time casually riding from place to place.

I met a nice-looking girl in the park the other evening. There was an instant spark between us.

She did this cute little dance, then immediately dropped to her knees and lay on the grass at my feet.

As we lay making love, I thought, “Damn, these Taser guns are really worth the money!"

Quick Update and Giggle

Hey y'all...I'm talking on my phone so not sure how this is going to come through. My inbox is full and I know I owe a lot of you responses but it's been a bad week. For those of you who didn't know my brother passed away on 31st of May, a lot sooner then what we thought. We had his memorial service Monday and internment Tuesday and I've had to try and support my mama through all of this and then I had my surgery yesterday. I'm doing okay just in a lot of pain and very woozy so hope this is making sense and coming out right. I didn't want all y'all to think I was ignoring you and I will try to respond to all your emails and messages just as soon as I can. For those of you that have my numbers you're welcome to call or text I'll try to answer I'm just not talking with a full deck at the moment. Anyway on to the show. Take care y'all hugs and blessings...Cat.

****************************************

It was breakfast time at the Smiths' house. Linda turned to her husband Frank with an irritated look and said: "I bet you don't remember what today is!"
 
"Of course I remember!" declared Frank, and hastily left for work.
 
When he reached his office, he immediately went to his best friend's office and shouted: "Mark, you have to help me - I think it's my wife's birthday today and I completely forgot about it!"
 
Mark calmed him down and opined that he should send his wife several gifts throughout the day. "That way there is no way she'll realize you just remembered. Besides, pick the right gifts and you'll have a very happy woman on your hands..."

Frank immediately goes and does exactly that, sending his wife a beautiful dress, her favorite perfume and even some sexy lingerie, each delivered to the house every few hours.
 
When evening came, Frank return to the house beaming with pride, and met his wife standing with a huge smile on her face. "First the beautiful dress, then the perfume I like so much, and then even some sexy lingerie! You really surprised me my love!"
 
"Think nothing on it my love, happy-"
 
"I never thought I'd wear such beautiful clothes to pick my mother up from the airport!"

Courtesy of BabaMail

Learning New Words

A missionary who had spent years showing a tribe of natives how to farm and build things to be self-sufficient gets word that he is to return home. 
 
He realizes that the one thing he never taught the natives was how to speak English, so he takes the chief and starts walking in the forest. He points to a tree and says to the chief, "This is a tree." The chief looks at the tree and grunts, "Tree." 
 
The missionary is pleased with the response.


 
They walk a little farther and the padre points to a rock and says, "This is a rock." Hearing this, the chief looks and grunts, "Rock." The padre is really getting enthusiastic about the results when he hears a rustling in the bushes. 
 
As he peeks over the top, he sees a couple in the midst of heavy sexual activity. The padre is really flustered and quickly responds, "Riding a bike." 
 
The chief looks at the couple briefly, pulls out his blow gun and kills them. 
 
The padre goes ballistic and yells at the chief that he has spent years teaching the tribe how to be civilized and kind to each other, so how could he just kill these people in cold blood that way?

 
"My bike."

Courtesy of BabaMail

The Sinking Friends

Morty and Saul, are out one afternoon on a lake when their boat starts sinking.

Saul the banker says to Morty, "So listen, Morty, you know I don't swim so well."

Morty remembered how to carry another swimmer from his lifeguard class when he was just a kid, so Morty begins tugging Saul toward shore. After twenty minutes, he begins to tire. 
 

Finally about 50 feet from shore, Morty asks Saul, "So Saul, do you suppose you could float alone?" 


Saul replies, "Morty, this is a hell of a time to be asking for money!"
 

Courtesy of BabaMail

Better Marriage

11 Ways To Radically Accept Your Spouse, For A WAY Better Marriage
 



So worth the effort!

Marriage and change go hand-in-hand.

It's no wonder that traditional marital vows are literally all about how spouses need to support and accept one another, no matter what circumstances come their way.

Even if you don't change your last name or where you live, getting married is a major change!
And life changes, no matter how positive or welcome, still can rock your self-esteem and sense of confidence.

You may also start to notice things in your partner that you never had before.
As you continue to solidify and form a new identity with the one you love, hyper-critical thinking can set in. And that's where strain really takes hold of an otherwise happy, healthy marriage.

Believe it or not, all marriages, no matter how strong, or deeply connected, will experience strain when change happens.

THIS is why couples benefit so much when they introduce the concept of Radical Acceptance into their relationship.
If you're unfamiliar with the concept, you can get a great introduction to it in Andrea Miller's new book, Radical Acceptance: The Secret to Happy, Lasting Love. It offers a relatable, actionable five-step plan to help couples realize the long-term benefits to introducing more empathy and compassion into their marriage.

It's both a selfless and a selfish act, because the act of empathizing with your spouse ends up making it a lot easier to empathize with yourself too.

And the individuals who learn how to radically accept their spouse and grow together despite it all — they end up having longer, happier marriages.

On top of that, our YourTango Experts have some serious insights on how accepting your spouse can lead to a more fulfilling marriage.
 
Here are 11 ideas for how you can introduce radical acceptance into your relationship. It will be SO worth it.
 
1.  The more you love yourself, the stronger your marriage will be.
“Unconditional love needs to be given ‘first to yourself’ before you can give it to your partner.

Self-love in a successful marriage is not a luxury, but a necessity. Loving yourself without judgment or condition is the cornerstone from which you build any serious long lasting, loving connection and relationship with someone else, certainly your partner in life.”

Danielle Sax is a coach, mentor, speaker and author who loves and lives her purpose and walks the talk. To discover more simple-but-powerful steps to activate conscious self-care and self-love and set healthy boundaries for yourself, visit Danielle’s website. 
 
 
2.  Understanding yourself can help you be more empathetic towards your spouse.
“Everyone wants to be accepted for who they are, and as we know even trying to change small things about ourselves is a huge challenge, so then why would one think that they can change something about their spouse?

Accepting the person you married is truly about not trying to change them. If you don’t like a behavior the only way to impact that is to change your response to that behavior because that will be a lot easier than thinking that you can change them.

Example:  He never picks up his clothing, and I am left doing that, I have asked him so many times and he just won’t do it. Instead, you can try a different approach or a new response, but the same response over and over gets the same results over and over... 
 
Accepting a person for who they are can also set you free because you then realize that you don’t have any control over them, just choices that you make about being with them.”

Dr. Dawn Michael is a certified clinical sexologist and relationship expert with a private practice in Thousand Oaks CA.  She has been working with couples for 19 years.  In addition to her practice she is an author, public speaker, and sex educator.  You can find her at www.thehappyspouse.com as well as her YouTube channel.  
 
 
3. Accept that people communicate love in different ways.
“To outrageously improve your marriage, accept and appreciate out loud that your partner shows his love by making sure all the light bulbs work, the bills are paid and the coffee is made (even if you’d really feel loved if he’d sit and talk with you).

Prioritize what’s important to her simply because it’s important to her (even if you feel she’s too anxious about being on time).

Accept that his initiating sex is his way of reaching out to connect (not because he just wants to satisfy his sexual appetite and is ignoring the emotional distance between the two of you).”

Deborah Fox, MSW is a couples therapist and Certified Sex Therapist helping couples reconnect and find their way back to a passionate relationship. Visit Deborah on her website, follow her blog on YourTango, or if you’re in the DC Metro area, call her at 202-363-1740 to discuss if she can be of help to you.
 
 
4. Remind yourself that you are different people who share the same marriage.
“Judgement sins, are like a knife. They ruin everything. Enhance romance, through melodic tones. Find a beautiful sonata with tones that describe endearing qualities your love possesses.

Frequent listening invokes remembrance, appreciation, and enjoyment of his or her goodness. At times, when one feels overwhelmed, irresistible attributes are forgotten.

Continuing in this pattern presents a difficulty. Admiration through soulful melodic vibrations augments the love frequency for those who believe that marital bliss is all about loving. The resulting acceptance changes the pattern, radically.”

Falena Magnussen is an author, religious advisor for young women and editor. Her books are available on Amazon.
 
 
5. Take time to self-reflect.
"If you are constantly asking yourself if you're with the right guy, then YOU are the wrong person for HIM.

That questioning means you are not fully stepping into the relationship.

And each of you deserves to have a partner who is all in."

Heidi Hartston, PhD is a psychologist in private practice in Oakland, CA. You can visit her website or watch her talks on YouTube.
 
 
6. If change must happen, remember you can only change yourself.
"The relentless struggle of trying to change your partner is surely likely to backfire. Despite all good intention, disapproval prevails, and leaves in its path the ruins of resentment".

Katherine Mazza, LMHC is a Couples Therapist in New York City. She is a Relationship Expert providing ongoing education and support for couples at The Relationship Place of NY. Visit her Facebook page and YourTango for articles and blog posts.
 
7. Find reasons to be thankful, and really mean it!
“Accept your spouse by showing more gratitude. Just take a minute right now to appreciate one thing they do in your life that you hate doing yourself.

Being grateful is one of the best ways to keep your loving going strong. But don't just think it, say it! Make sure your spouse knows he/she's got the best partner on the planet.

When the lust fades, show them gratitude for the rest of your days. When the lust fades, offer gratitude in heartfelt ways.”

Lori Peters is a writer, speaker and radio show host on happiness in relationships. Check out her website and make sure to sign up for her Happiness Quick reads at www.happinesshangout.net.
 
 
8. Cultivate your marriage by being a good friend to your spouse. 
“Live every day with a renewed appreciation for him and your love for each other will deepen and strengthen.” “If you have a love–friendship instead of love-hate relationship, it is your friendship with each other that will smooth the rough spots when the love part hits a speed bump.

That’s when you can sit down as supportive friends and talk about what’s happening to the marriage, and how to make it right again.

Radical acceptance means loving him without borders or boundaries. There is no ‘but’ or ‘maybe’ or ‘if’; it means you include him into your heart because loving him is paramount to loving yourself.”

Margot Brown has helped couples and individuals create happier lives for 20 years. She’s the author of: “Kickstart Your Relationship Now! Move On or Move Out” You can find it on Amazon or in a local bookstore near you.
 
 
9. Enjoy the diversity you both bring to the marriage.
"Let go of the fantasy image of your spouse that you hold in your head. When you compare a real live human being to the perfect one in your mind, they will always come up lacking.

Instead, focus on having gratitude for the real person in your life — for the traits and quirks they have that you love, and also for the things you don't love and how these may be helping you to grow and mature.

Most of us hold within us an unrealistic ideal, and when this clashes with reality then we end up suffering. A happy marriage is one where you see your partner for who they truly are rather than as you wished they would be."

Mia Von Scha is a life coach who works with parents to steer them on their family adventure, guiding them through relationship, child raising and life challenges. Join the journey and get Mia's Top 5 Parenting Survival Tools free!
 
 
10. Allow room for growth, for both you and your partner.
“Marriage is a committed partnership in which we often expect our loved ones to change or evolve at the same pace we do.

Accepting our partners will undergo personal growth in their own time and in their own way requires true patience.

But is essential as it provides the unconditional love they require from us to be successful in their transition.”

Michelle Tajudeen is a certified Coach with the International Coaching Federation and Founder of MetaCC Incorporated. You can follow her blog on YourTango or learn more about her on her website.
 
 
11. Grow together.
“Acceptance is the answer to all my problems." —The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Acceptance of another person’s point of view is the beginning of respectful and effective communication. Acceptance does not necessarily mean agreement, however, saying “I hear you and understand what you are saying,” opens the door to being heard as well.

Once both legitimate perspectives are on the table, we can begin to resolve issues. Men and women have different ways of looking at things.

These perspectives, while not the same, can be compatible.

Radical acceptance clears the way for resolution, reduces defensiveness and allows a relationship to deepen and bloom, even during difficult periods of stress.”
 

Courtesy of Your Tango

Seeing a Therapist Together

An Arizona couple, both well into their 80's, went to a relations therapist's office.
 
The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?" 
The man said, "Will you watch us have intercourse?" 
 
The doctor raised both eyebrows, but he was so amazed that such an elderly couple was asking for advice that he agreed.


Image courtesy of Depositphotos
 
When the couple finished, the doctor said, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." 
 
He thanked them for coming, wished them good luck, charged them $50 and said good bye. 
 
The next week, the same couple returned and asked the therapist to watch again. The therapist was a bit puzzled, but agreed.


Image courtesy of Depositphotos
 
This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave. 
 
Finally, after three months of this routine, the doctor said, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?"
 
The man said, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married; so we can't go to her house. I'm married; and we can't go to my house. 
 
The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and best of all....


source

"Medicare pays $43 of it!"

Courtesy of BabaMail

The Best of George Carlin Quotes

For those who love the philosophy of hypocrisy and ambiguity, here are a few statements to ponder by a very clever comedian with a knack for the spoken (and written) word. George Carlin enjoyed a successful 30-year-career of making people howl with laughter, and is known by many as the grandfather of stand up comedy. He was also voted the best comedian in history by his fellow comedians.

1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? 
5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
6. I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
7. Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts, but as mattresses?
8. If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
9. If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
10. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
11. Is there another word for synonym?



12. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
13. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
14. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
15. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
16. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
17. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
18. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
19. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
20. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
21. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
22. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?



23. How do blind people know when they are done wiping?
24. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
25. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
26. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
27. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
28. To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated, but not be able to say it.
29. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
30. The older you get, the better you realize you were.
31. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
32. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
33. Women like silent men, they think they're listening.



34. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
35. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
36. Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays?
37. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
38. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
39. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
40. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
41. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
42. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
43. If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
44. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Courtesy of BabaMail