"Do You know you were speeding?"
The 83-year-old woman gave the young officer an ear to ear smile and stated:
"Yes , but ..... I had to get there before I forgot where I was going."
The officer put his ticket book away and bid her good day.
Makes perfectly good sense to me!
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"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding all the items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."
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A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield.
Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, that was an insect."
To which her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a dick that big." ~X®
Courtesy of Randomly Funny $tuff
ROFLMBO
ReplyDeleteAawww. What a clever gal, and such a nice policeman! Very diabolical wife! And that mother is clearly out of touch with her child's social knowledge! Lol!
ReplyDeleteThat second one!!! What a nasty piece of revenge....LOL
ReplyDeleteYou always make me laugh :) I threw my head back laughing at the third one and hit my head on the wall :P
ReplyDeleteLoL Cat, loved these, thanks for sharing. The first one was so cute, gotta love the policeman. I'm guessing the wife in the second one isn't a DD/TTWD wife LoL
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Roz
Oh my gosh! I almost spit my drink on the keyboard when I read the last one! Too funny!!!
ReplyDelete