Snowplow Issue

Blue Bird of Happiness!

BLUE BIRD OF HAPPINESS, MY ASS!

It's Friggin' Freezing.  

There's snow up my ass, 

All the food's covered 

With 3 feet of this white shit, 

And you want ME to sing?  

What??  

Anne Murray's "Snowbird"?  

Piss Off!!  

Next year, I'm flyin' to Jamaica, and smokin’ dope!! 

How to tell it’s Winter

Thanks to Meredith's Jack for sharing these sweet pics…

Cold Hands

A couple decided to go to Alaska for a romantic weekend. 
 
When they got to the cabin it was cold so the wife asked her husband to go chop some wood for that fire place. 
 
He came in after 5 minutes and told his wife that his hands were cold, so she said her put your hands between my thighs to warm them. 
 
So he did and went back outside to finish chopping wood. 

 
 
He came in after another 5 minutes and said " honey my hands are cold again". 
 
So she tells him here put your hands between my thighs to warm them.
 
So he did and then he went back out to chop some more wood. 

 
 
5 minutes has passed and he went in again and said, "honey my hands are cold again". 
 
She then said, " Damn don't your ears ever get cold?"
 

Now Would be Good

Many of our family members here in blog land are being hit or will be hit by tomorrow with the ice and snow that is covering the south and east portions of the United States.  

Some of them are either without power and/or heat or are in danger of losing one or both.  No matter what your beliefs, please send them prayers and/or positive energy.

Sending lots of prayers, positive energy and loving thoughts for all of you in harms way.

If y'all have power along with internet and can read this, please stay safe!

Snow Snow and More Snow!

I am snowed in and if I’m lucky, I’ll be out by spring thaw! LOL

It’s not really easy to see how deep the snow is but the little bit of brown you see in the first picture is a 12 inch ruler…this is up near the garage and was protected from the winds so this is what we actually got…it is sitting on two layers of ice…the first from Saturday and the second from yesterday between two bouts of snow so it is probably closer to 15 inches total. 

In places, I have 2 and 3 foot drifts and in others, you can see grass sticking through.  Unfortunately, in my driveway, it is 12 inches plus...even though it doesn’t really look like it in the pictures. Where I shuffled down a short bit of my driveway in the picture…that is actually 12 inches deep!

This is where is shuffled down the driveway just a bit…it curves back to the left and then left again and then long straightaway!

 

 

 

And we’re due for more snow in here Saturday, Monday, Tuesday with another major snow storm in next weekend…*sigh*    

Snow in May?

 

Or a nightmare...at least where the snow is concerned!  grrrrr

 

Snow in May?!?  I do believe Mother Nature is having a nervous breakdown!

Spring?

Hellooooo…..

My Internet is back so I’m “HOME” and doing my Happy Dance!!!!!!

My ex got in between snowstorms with his 4WD and got me to the store so I was well stocked, including batteries. *snicker* (oops, forgot batteries for the alarm backup)

I was afraid I would lose power and/or internet when the storm hit so I pre-scheduled posts for the week.  Good thing I did as Monday night, I lost TV and Internet, got the TV back Wednesday night but just got the Internet back today.  Lost power for a few hours Tuesday and it flickered every so often but hasn’t since last night so think I’m in good shape, for now.  Due for more snow here Monday! Grrrrr  (Will have more posts pre-scheduled…just in case.)  My ex got in the morning to get me re-stocked as I still can’t get my car out! (Yes, I remembered batteries for the alarm clocks and a few other items. )

Didn’t even try to read blogs since blogger doesn't like my phone and it's impossible to comment.   I was only checking email once a day since I had to do it by phone and was afraid of draining the battery.  Didn’t want to have a dead phone if the power went!  As the week went on, I really began to suffer withdrawal symptoms...missing my friends and blogging so started checking email twice a day.

Thanks to all of you who checked on me.  You really touched my heart.  I know I owe quite a few people emails and promise to get them answered as soon as I can.  Answering from my phone is a pain and also drains the battery.

Just scanning through my reading list and dang, so much has gone on in blog land while I’ve been gone.  

Birthday’s for Dragon and Ana…Happy Birthday to both of you.

Women sending pictures to Bas…sorry Bas, none from me…camera’s break when they are pointed at me!  Oh my, you do sound handsome!

Cover reveals…woohoo…congrats!

New stories…from Ana on FF and Cassie…will definitely have to read those! 

Blogiversaries  and DDversaries…congrats!

Rogue’s son is now a Marine…welcome to the Marine Mom’s club Rogue and congrats to your very special son. 

And then we have haircuts, communication, respect, new blog names, dryers on the fritz, taxes, yawning during spanking (Really?), DD comparisons, vacations, chocolate, maintenance, RA, reconnection, small but powerful gestures, new bloggers, dictators, Clitoral Tugs (Definitely a must-read!), frills and lace, leniency, consistency, distancing (with pickles ), drama, cliques, stress, PMS, dieting, effort and follow-through, definitions of an HoH, art, recipes, etc. 

Sheesh, got tired just reading the opening blurbs about some of the one's I’ve missed and haven’t even gotten through all of them!  Will read as I get a chance and ya might get a ‘late to the party’ comment but then again, ya might not. *teehee*

Thought I would share a few pictures…

 

Hopefully, I’m back but am prepared if I go down again and you will still have daily posts here.  I promise to get through all the unanswered comments on my blog as soon as I can but please be patient.

Market Research

FYI:  This section is not a giggle or a grin unfortunately.  A good portion of the midwest US is due for extremely severe weather...snow storms and blizzards.  I have pre-scheduled posts so that if I lose internet or power, you will still have your daily fix of giggles but it may be a few days before I can respond to your comments or to emails or comment or your blog. 

Now on to our story...


A man doing market research knocked on a door. He was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.

He says, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?"

She says, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time."

"And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?"

"We use it for sex."

The researcher was a little taken back.

He replied with candor, "Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge.  But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex.  I admire you for your honesty.  Since you've been frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it for sex?"

The woman says, "I don't mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it on the door knob to keep the kids out."

Helpful hint for those of you with small kids?