Thank You and Update

This community is awesome!

Thank you for all the prayers, healing energy, positive thoughts, warm hugs and support you have sent via comments, emails, texts and phone calls.

Thank you, thank you, thank you…I can’t say this enough. I am convinced that all the positive thoughts, healing energy and prayers that have been sent are the reason that my Mom is still with us!

Even though I have not responded to all of your comments and emails, please know that I have read each one of them…usually with tears in my eyes. Each new one helped keep me focused on the positive! It will probably take me some time, but I will try to respond as soon as I can.

A special thank you to two very supportive and lovely ladies…Ami of Ami’s Star Song and Minelle of My Breath for posting updates of my Mom’s condition.

Update on Mom
Mom came through the cardiac catheterization with flying colors...her arteries look great and she has no blockages. We received the results from the echo cardiogram and there is no permanent damage to her heart!

Mom was moved out of ICU today and the plan is now to work on figuring out the original issue...the one that brought her to the hospital to begin with! LOL Hopefully, they will get that figured out and we will get her home within a week or so.

Sending grateful hugs and blessings to all of you…you are definitely THE GOOD!

 

Paradox

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.
 
We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.
 
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
 
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; we've added years to life, not life to years.
 
We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; we've done larger things, but not better things.
 
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice.
 
We write more, but learn less; we plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes, but lower morals; we have more food, but less appeasement; we build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; we've become long on quantity, but short on quality.
 
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men, and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition.
 
These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet to kill.
 
It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom...
 

By Dr. Bob Moorehead

 

Courtesy of Randomly Funny $tuff

Memo

To:  All Employees
Subject:  S.H.I.T.

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and Productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.).

We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the course, please see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Employees who don’t take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.).

Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they don’t have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T. you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.).

For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T.). This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T.

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.).

Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)
and
The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training. (The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T.).

Gone Fishin’

‘

Of course, if you don't like fishing, frog legs are just darn good eatin’!  Whichever, just don't run out of Jack Daniels!    

Magic Mirror

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head all went to an antique store and saw a beautiful old mirror.

The lady working at the store said, "This is a magic mirror.  You must say something true.  And if it's true, your wish will come true.  If it's not true, you will disappear."


The blonde, red head, and brunette decided to buy the mirror, and brought it home with them.

First the red head walked up to the mirror and said, "I think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world."

Poof, she vanished.


Then the brunette walked up to the mirror and said, "I think I'm the smartest girl in the world."

Poof, she vanished.


Then the blonde walked up to the mirror and said, "I think... "

Poof, she vanished.

Fifty Shades of...

 

Sound familiar?  LOL

Smiling

  

Bang!

Doubt if I could train either one of my cats to do this! LOL

Old Dogs

One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost.


Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep s*** now!"

 

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

 
"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"



Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther.

So, off he goes.


The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"



Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...
 

"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"

Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the old dogs...

Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

BS and brilliance only come with age and experience!

LOL  

Helpful Cooking Hints...

…with a twist!  To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes. Buy Smash mashed potato mix. Keeps in the cupboard for up to a year. When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.  Go to the bakery! Hell, they'll even decorate it for you! Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks. Celery? Never heard of it! Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink! All your pains go away! Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. Leftover wine???????  HELLO!!!!!!

Hope you enjoy!