New Apartment

After closing time at the bar, a  drunk was proudly showing off his new apartment to a couple of his  friends.

He led the way to his bedroom  where there was a big brass gong and a  mallet.




"What's up with the big brass  gong?" one of his guests asked.

"It's not a gong. It's a talking  clock," the drunk replied.

"A talking clock? Seriously?"  asked his astonished friend.

"Yup," replied the  drunk.

"How's it work?" the friend  asked, squinting at it.

"Watch," the drunk  replied.


He picked up the mallet, gave  the gong an ear-shattering pound and stepped  back.



The three stood looking at one  another for a moment.



Suddenly a voice on the other  side of the wall screamed..."You  asshole!  It's three-fifteen in the  morning!"